Many people say that cooking and eating at home is better for individuals and the family than eating out in restaurants or canteens. Do you agree or disagree?

Many
people
feel that homemade
foods
are far
more
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apply
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better than, outdoor meals,
to
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for
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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family members and alone
people
. I agree with the statement, in
this
essay will be discussed in more detail. In the past,
people
had enough time to do their own things,
in
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apply
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nowadays they haven’t extra time to do things.
Such
as cooking, and cleaning their home like that.
As a result
, many
people
are tempted, to their daily
consumption
Replace the word
consume
show examples
from restaurants and the canteen.
However
, homemade
foods
can provide more benefits to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
.
Firstly
, It may reduce health hazards,
such
as obesity, cardiovascular diseases, and diabetes.
Secondly
,
that
Correct word choice
apply
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foods
are more expensive because
people
can purchase from the market,
such
as vegetables, fish, and other ingredients, that help reduce their cost of living.
Thirdly
, meal consumption at home
it
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apply
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would help to develop the family bond,
thus
cooking food at home
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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may provide more benefits to the family and alone
people
.
On the other hand
,
resturent
Correct your spelling
restaurant
food has led to many detrimental effects to the family and individuals.
firstly
nowadays many
people
are getting
to
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apply
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health problems,
such
as cancer and childhood obesity,
therefore
it affects
to
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apply
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the healthcare system and society.
secondly
, economic problems that meals are expensive more than homemade
foods
. it is a waste of money.
Thirdly
, it has led to a disconnect between family relationships. In conclusion, homemade
foods
could provide more benefits to the family and individuals. Reduce health problems, save money, and increase the family relationship.
Submitted by dhanushkalakmal19 on

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coherence cohesion
Try to organize your ideas more logically. Each paragraph should focus on a single main point and provide supporting details
task achievement
Elaborate on your points with more relevant and specific examples to better support your arguments
coherence cohesion
Avoid minor grammatical errors and pay attention to the use of transitions for smoother flow of ideas
coherence cohesion
The essay includes both an introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt and provided reasons to support your opinion.

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