IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Art classes such as painting and drawing are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is believed that aesthetic classes
such
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 as drawing and painting are as essential to a child’s evolution as other subjects, so they are necessary in high schools. The writer of
this
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 essay agrees that these forms of
art
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 should be valued the same as other fields and will give information to support their decision. There can be no doubt that
the
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apply
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art
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 classes have been holding a respectful position in education for ages. It is usually seen in secondary schools, where teachers give some drawing or painting tests to students to mark their grades in the future. Needless to say, there is a majority of pupils who would like to attend
this
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 kind of lecture in order to enhance their mental skills,
such
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 as creativity and imagination.
Furthermore
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, by doing craftwork, the precision of their paintings will increase soon afterwards.
Additionally
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, doing artwork can reveal the student’s inner talent.
This
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 belief is based on the fact that many colleagues do not know they are skilled in drawing or painting until they do it.
This
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 will lead to enormous success in the future and
also
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 raise their knowledge standard to a higher level.
For example
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, many schools have organized
many
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apply
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art
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 contests to find more students who have talent
in
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apply
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them
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, and in the end, many students realized that they were gifted with
the
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apply
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art
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 skills. In conclusion, because drawing and painting can improve people’s potential skills, the writer of
this
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 essay acknowledged that
this
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 subject should be taught equally
with
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to
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 others.
Thus
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, it can affect the student’s scores in school.

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task achievement
While your essay covers the prompt well, try to delve deeper into specific examples to support your claims. Adding examples or data can make your arguments stronger and more compelling.
coherence cohesion
You have good coherence and cohesion overall, but make sure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next. Using more transitional phrases can improve the flow and readability of your essay.
grammar lexis
Try to avoid minor grammatical and lexical errors, even though they don't drastically affect readability, as they can detract from your overall score.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly establishes your stance on the topic, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.
coherence cohesion
Your arguments are well-structured, presenting logical reasons for why art classes are beneficial to students.
task achievement
You have a balanced and clear argument, showcasing both the practical and psychological benefits of art education.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • creativity
  • innovation
  • emotional wellbeing
  • mental health
  • fine motor skills
  • eye-hand coordination
  • self-expression
  • self-esteem
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • inclusivity
  • academic performance
  • artistic activities
  • complement
  • enhance learning
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