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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools or disagree? To what extent do you agree

#art #classes #child #development #subjects #schools
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Some people believe that
art
 should become compulsory in
schools
 because of its positive effects on the maturity of
children
. The writer of
this
 essay holds a view that it should be optional as being suitable for gifted
students
. Education nowadays has the potential for the development of society and
art
 classes become popular with all of them. There are various advantages of
this
subject
 as it affects directly the way
children
 approach knowledge.
Firstly
,
art
 is useful to social lives since it is practical and helps humans have aesthetic views.
Moreover
, people will rest when they draw or paint,
this
 leads to satisfaction when they are under pressure.
Moreover
,
children
 can learn
this
 in a creative way as they do not have to use a puzzle calculator like Mathematics. Because of these benefits of
art
, it
becomes
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
 a
subject
 at most
schools
.
For instance
, almost all fields use
art
 to complete tasks
such
 as construction or economy.
On the other hand
, some
students
 are not good at drawing and are frustrated when they have
art
 classes.
That is
 why
art
 should not be a compulsory
subject
 at
schools
. Some gifted
students
 have
art
 abilities but others do not.
Therefore
, if they have to study
art
 they will not focus on what they learn and abandon in some classes.
Although
 it is acknowledged that
art
 helps pupils carry out their different duties, it should be optional for some enabled
students
. To be more specific, the number of
art
schools
 has increased in recent years since parents pay more attention to the abilities of their
children
.
Thus
, education plays a vital role in the development of a child and
art
 becomes more beneficial.
However
, it should be an optional
subject
 and
students
 can choose if they want or not.
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introduction conclusion present
Expand on the introduction to give a clearer understanding of your essay's stance. A more detailed introduction will help readers better grasp your argument early on.
relevant specific examples
Use more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention studies or real-life examples where art has positively or negatively impacted students.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that each point made in the essay is clearly explained and elaborated. Sometimes elaboration on why certain aspects of art are beneficial or not can strengthen your arguments.
logical structure
The essay presents a balanced view, acknowledging both the benefits of art classes and the potential challenges for students who may not be inclined towards art.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer’s stance, making the argument clear and cohesive.
complete response
The essay addresses the task prompt fully, discussing both sides of the argument and offering a clear opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enhances
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • innovatively
  • curriculum
  • mental health
  • emotional expression
  • stress relief
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • creatively
  • cultural diversity
  • artistic traditions
  • compulsory
  • well-rounded education
  • academic performance
  • concentrate
  • attention to detail
  • persevere
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