The floorplans show the layout of a cinema in 1980 and the same cinema now.

Contained in the plans is information pertaining to changes which took place in a cinema between 1980 and the present.
Overall
, there has been an increase in the number of movie houses,
although
the original cinemas have changed location and size. It can
also
be observed that
further
renovations have included a greater number of amenities,
while
the car park has been demolished. In 1980, the cinema was relatively empty, with only two cinemas, the first located to the left of the entrance,
while
the second was positioned to the mid-right centre.
However
, these movie houses have now been relocated on either
side
of the toilet block to the left-hand
side
,
while
simultaneously removing the car park that stretched across the entirety of the plan. Moving on to other important changes. Now that cinema one has relocated, a relaxation room and refreshment area have been erected. To the right-hand
side
of the entrance, the ticket office remains,
while
adjacent to
this
, the drink area has now been turned into a DVD shop. A final point of interest is that three cinemas now occupy the right-hand
side
of the plan.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

advice
Your essay provides a clear response to the task by describing the changes in the cinema layout. However, adding a brief conclusion could strengthen the overall response.
advice
While your essay is logically structured and easy to follow, consider ensuring that transitions between paragraphs are smoother to enhance the flow of ideas.
advice
To further enrich your description, consider elaborating on specific changes and mentioning their potential impact on visitors' experience.
highlight
Your main points are well supported with specific details about the changes in the cinema layout.
highlight
The introduction effectively frames the essay by summarizing the key changes observed.
highlight
You provided relevant examples that clearly depict the transformation from 1980 to the present.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: