IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city

#countries #university #students #home #study #city
it is true that some students apply to universities far from their homes and are
therefore
 forced to live in another city
while
 others want to be in their homes with their families. in
this
 essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living far away from home during university before giving my opinion on the issue. there are a variety of benefits to living away from your family during your studies. One of the major benefits can be the life experience. To illustrate, students will have life experience that will improve themselves, because they will do everything by themselves.
For example
, they will face multiple problems or challenges and they will have to solve them without help from their parents so
this
 will make them learn self-confidence.
In addition
, they will be more independent in all aspects of their life , especially in their daily lives.
For instance
, they will learn to cook, do the laundry, organise and clean. The main challenge that students will face when they are studying far away from their families is the significant responsibilities
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because they aren't used to doing everything by themselves.
For example
, they rely on their mother to cook and prepare everything for them. So, when they live far away, they feel the weight of these responsibilities. In conclusion, I strongly believe that distance can make a significant difference in a person's personality, and it can improve their minds, change their ideas, and make them see the world from a different perspective.
Therefore
, it is far better to study in different cities despite the challenges that they will face.
Submitted by t.albadaei.ta on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
In the introduction, try to refine the thesis statement to clearly mention you will discuss both advantages and disadvantages. For example, 'In this essay, I will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of living far from home during university.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure that paragraphs are distinct and focus on a single main idea. For example, one paragraph for advantages and another for disadvantages. This clarity can improve readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively summarizes the points discussed.
task achievement
The examples used to illustrate points are relevant and help in understanding the arguments presented.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
What to do next:
Look at other essays: