Some people think that teenagers who commit crimes should be treated the same way as adult criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
me
people
believe that youth should be treated law when committing crimes
like old people
criminals
while
others think that young people
has
not treated the same adults.Change the verb form
have
This
topic should be examined before forming an opinion. Both points of view will be discussed in the following essay.
Some people
think that youth treated
who commit Verb problem
apply
crimes
should be taken the same way as adult criminals
for several reasons . For example
, a study published at New York University concluded that 40% of countries issued for
Change preposition
apply
teenagers
the same laws when
adult Correct word choice
as
criminals
take
and they see Verb problem
apply
this
as a great method for teenagers
. Furthermore
, this
strict punishment will help to change all teenagers
for the better than before .will decrease the bad friends that have and improve a life of young people
. If they did not make these decisions life would be worse and be easier for young criminals
. In addition
, teenagers
will feel a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
nerves
and stressed in Replace the word
nervous
this
way .
Alternatively, others argue that youth should not be punishment
like adults for many factors. Replace the word
punished
For instance
, Sometimes young people
commit crimes
and they do not know it .Thus
, some said teenagers
should
poverty levels are rising in many cities and some young Verb problem
apply
people
need to provide for their families to pay for daily needs such
as; food, health care, clothing, and rent instead
of being treated under the same laws as adults criminals
because that was a some reason of teenage crimes
In short, teenage crimes
are a controversial topic with different opinions . Both sides have their merits on balance. Personally, I believe that the advantages of issued
laws for old Wrong verb form
issuing
people
for younger people
are more negative.Submitted by alasu8899 on
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introduction conclusion present
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion. Currently, it hints at both viewpoints but does not clearly position your stance.
logical structure
Strengthen your topic sentences to clearly demarcate the main ideas of each paragraph.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific and precise examples to support your points. This will improve the relevance and strength of your arguments.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure each idea is fully developed and clearly presented. Some sentences are unclear and need better expression.
logical structure
Work on grammar and phrasing. Incorrect or unclear constructions affect readability and coherence.
supported main points
The essay attempts to present both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach.
introduction conclusion present
A conclusion is present, summarizing the discussion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?