There are more new towns being built nowadays. It is more important to include public parks and sports facilities than shopping centres for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent decades, new towns emerged at a startling pace and
has
brought inhabitants great living conditions. To better improve public Change the verb form
have
health
and build up harmonious communities, many people
advocate for increasing public parks
and sports
facilities. I strongly agree with this
idea, and I believe it is beneficial to individuals and the socciety
as well.
Correct your spelling
society
To begin
with, parks
and sports
fields provide local citizens with more opportunities to exercise thus
benefiting people
's physical fitness as well as
mental health
. It is universally acknowledged that sports
are good for our body's health
, however
, people
nowadays rarely get time for regular exercise from their busy daily routine, for example
, nine-to-five workers and full-time students, some people
even cannot afford to go to the
gym every day. Correct article usage
apply
Therefore
, public infrastructure gives residents free access to maintain a healthy lifestyle with regular exercise. Moreover
, relaxing in the parks
can relieve people
's stress from work and studies, thus
enhancing their mental health
.
In addition
, public parks
and sports
fields are the perfect places for families to have leisure activities and for communities to hold some special events, thus
strengthening family bonds and enhancing neighbourly relationships. For instance
, it may become a beautiful city landscape if some families are having a picnic in the park, couples are holding hands and walking on the pathways, some young men are jogging, and some children are playing a football match. These public facilities are definitely important for individuals and the community.
To conclude
, public parks
and sports
play a vital role in modern life, especially in emerging towns and cities. Though some people
would argue that money should be spent on other infrastructures such
as public transportation, I still believe reasonable governmental investment in such
public facilities will bring advantageous effects to all citizens and the society as a whole.Submitted by carriexue23 on
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General
Your essay is strong and well-structured. However, further elaborating some examples could make your points even more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Consider addressing possible counterarguments more thoroughly to strengthen your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, which makes it easy to follow your argument.
Task Achievement
You provide strong main points that directly address the prompt, supported by relevant examples.