Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Governments should spend money on
railways
rather than
roads
.
This
essay covers agreements and disagreements
why
Change preposition
on why
show examples
must be allocated money for
railways
more than
roads
. I agree that
expending
Correct your spelling
expanding
show examples
to
railways
must be more than
roads
due to
both
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
situation and
Correct article usage
the sollution
show examples
sollution
Correct your spelling
solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
global
Add an article
a global
the global
show examples
problem.
First,
railways
can be more environmentally friendly, releasing fewer greenhouse gases per passenger compared to cars or trucks.
Second,
they can help reduce traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
that it is all over the world’s global problem.
Third,
railways
can carry energy efficiently, especially for long-distance travel or transporting heavy goods. I
agree
Add the preposition
agree on
agree to
agree with
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
idea that
railways
have
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
effect
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
economic development by connecting regions, facilitating trade and promoting tourism.
For
instance
Add a comma
instance,
show examples
nowadays fast trains users
increase
Wrong verb form
have increased
show examples
because commuting by train is cheaper and cleaner than bus. And
also
,
travel
Correct your spelling
travelling
show examples
by train if you want to
see
Verb problem
go
show examples
sightseeing,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can create an advantage
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
you to watch scenery along the way that can be fun. Proponents of investing in
roads
prefer them
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because
railways
remoting might be
impractial
Correct your spelling
impractical
or
prohibitevely
Correct your spelling
prohibitively
expensive.
Roads
are often seen as more resilient to extreme weather events or natural disasters compared to
railways
, which can be susceptible to disruptions.
In addition
, they offer greater door-to-door
convinience
Correct your spelling
convenience
for passengers and bulk as well
flexibility
Correct word choice
as flexibility
show examples
in route planning.
To conclude
, if considered for
nature
Replace the word
natural
show examples
pollution and economic development
railways
are recommended more than
roads
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because
railways
prevent air pollution
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
is
importan
Correct your spelling
important
for all people.
İf
Correct your spelling
If
flexibility is
choosen
Correct your spelling
chosen
, people find
roads
accessible.
Submitted by checkmyessay9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Your introduction is clear but could be improved by briefly stating the main points you will discuss. For example, mention that you will discuss the economic and environmental benefits of railways.
task response
Try to use more specific examples to support your points. For instance, mention specific countries or cities where railways have been particularly beneficial.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences are a bit unclear due to minor grammatical errors. Consider reviewing and correcting these to improve clarity. For example, 'sollution' should be 'solution' and 'importan' should be 'important'.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph strictly discusses a single main idea. This will help in maintaining clarity and focus.
coherence cohesion
Expand on your conclusion to better summarize the points discussed and reiterate your main argument.
task response
You have a clear and well-structured essay that addresses both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
You provided a good range of ideas and showed a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
Good use of linking words and phrases such as 'for instance' and 'in addition' to connect your ideas.
task response
Your examples about the environmental benefits and economic development of railways are effective in supporting your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
What to do next:
Look at other essays: