(QG) Some people think watching TV is bad for children, while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#qg #people #tv #children #effects

Many people are of the opinion that watching

can have negative effects on

children

whereas

, others say it may be good for their childhood.

This

essay will discuss both views and give the writer's opinion. It should be

acknowleged

Correct your spelling

acknowledged

that televisions have useful information for

children

. These pieces of information are from specific

programs

that convey a wide range

from

Change preposition

show examples

science to society behaviours to audiences.

Moreover

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show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

early age,

children

are open-minded and enthusiastic

Change preposition

about

show examples

the open world.

As a result

can be

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show examples

initial step for

children

to gain new knowledge that stay in their

mind

Fix the agreement mistake

minds

show examples

for a long time since they grow up.

Change preposition

According to

show examples

VNExpress,

children

in kindergartens now have a fixed time to watch

programs

about science and some basic skills to enhance their knowledge about their world.

However

this

activity can

also

affect

Change preposition

apply

show examples

children

's lifestyle. When they stay at home and enjoy

programs

children

can

Verb problem

become

show examples

addicted to them and ignore outdoor activities or communication with relatives and friends.

This

leads to an inactive lifestyle among them,

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of social interaction and health problems

such

as obesity and

eyes

Change the noun form

eye

show examples

strains.

For example

, in 2015, Vietnam saw

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show examples

increase number of

children

who

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

suffer from myopia diseases

that

Correct word choice

and

show examples

the proportion of them is around 70%. The writer

contend

Change the verb form

contends

show examples

that watching

is a

benefical

Correct your spelling

beneficial

activity

due to

its advantages. By watching these useful

programs

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show examples

their

Change the word

show examples

early age with a limited time, the kids can develop their brains and

initially

Add a missing verb

are initially

show examples

ready

for studying

Change preposition

to study

show examples

effectively.

To sum up

, watching

has both advantages and disadvantages for kids.

Athough

Correct your spelling

Although

its drawbacks are harmful,

this

activity should be considered to apply widely to kindergartens to help

children

obtain simple knowledge.

Thu May 23 2024

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task achievement

Make sure to elaborate on points more thoroughly to strengthen your argument. For instance, providing more specific examples or data can bolster your point about the advantages of children watching TV.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a logical structure and flows well, but some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Using more transition words or phrases can enhance coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

Your introduction clearly sets up the essay and states the intention to discuss both views and give your opinion. This is well done.

coherence cohesion

The essay uses clear topic sentences to introduce each paragraph, which helps guide the reader through your points effectively.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, which gives the essay a cohesive end.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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(QG) Some people think watching TV is bad for children, while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Although family is a powerful influence on a child's life, it is also influenced from outside the home. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people work for the same organisation all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

the most important of sience should be to improve people's live to what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.