Some people think watching TV. is bad for children, while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #tv #children #effects

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Many people are of the opinion that watching

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can have negative effects on offspring,

whereas

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, others say it may be good for their childhood.

This

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essay will discuss both views and give the writer's opinion. It should be acknowledged that televisions have useful information for offspring. These pieces of information are from specific

programs

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that convey a wide range of science to

society

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societal

show examples

behaviours to audiences.

Moreover

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, at an early age, offspring are open-minded and enthusiastic

Change preposition

about

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the open world.

As a result

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can be an initial step for

children

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to gain new knowledge that

stay

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stays

show examples

in their minds for a long time since they grow up.

According to

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VNExpress,

children

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in kindergartens now have a fixed time to watch

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programs

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about science and some basic skills to enhance their knowledge about their world.

However

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this

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activity can

also

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affect

children

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's lifestyle. When they stay at home and enjoy

programs

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children

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can become addicted to them and ignore outdoor activities or communication with relatives and friends.

This

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leads to an inactive lifestyle among them, a lack of social interaction and health problems

such

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as obesity and eye strains.

For example

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, in 2015, Vietnam saw an

increase

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increasing

show examples

number of

children

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who suffer from myopia diseases and the proportion of them is around 70%. The writer contends that watching

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is a beneficial activity

due to

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its advantages. By watching these useful

programs

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at an early age with a limited time, the kids can develop their brains and are

initially

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ready to study effectively.

To sum up

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, watching

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has both advantages and disadvantages for kids.

Although

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its drawbacks are harmful,

this

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activity should be considered to apply widely to kindergartens to help

children

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obtain simple knowledge.

Thu May 23 2024

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task achievement

Your introduction is clear and provides a good overview of the essay. However, it can be further improved by being a bit more engaging to capture the reader's interest right away.

task achievement

While the main points are well-supported and relevant, the explanation of negative effects could be expanded a bit more for better balance. For instance, you could mention the role of parental supervision to mitigate negative impacts.

task achievement

Strengthen the second body paragraph by using more specific details or statistics to support your argument clearly.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next to enhance the essay’s cohesion. For example, a concluding sentence in the first body paragraph could introduce the counter-point discussed in the following paragraph.

coherence cohesion

Review the use of conjunctions and transitions to enhance the logical flow. For example, the transition from discussing the benefits of watching TV to the drawbacks could be smoother with an appropriate linking phrase.

task achievement

Your essay covers multiple points quite comprehensively, and the use of specific examples like the VNExpress reference adds credibility.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good overview and summary of your arguments.

coherence cohesion

Each paragraph has a clear main idea and is relatively well-structured.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

292 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

sedentary behavior
unrealistic perceptions
creative pursuits
social development
emotional development
constructive content
screen time
parental guidance
critical thinking
active learning
age-appropriate
media literacy
family bonding
moderation
perceive

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Some people think watching TV. is bad for children, while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that all lawbreakers should be taken into prison. In contrast, others believe there are better alternatives (for example, doing work or learning skills in the community). Discuss both views and give your opinion.

⁠The older generations tend to have very traditional ideas about how people should live, think and behave. However, some people believe that these ideas are not helpful in preparing younger generations for modern life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television.

Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

As countries develop, their populations tend to live individually or in small family units. What are the causes of this trend and what are the effects on society？