Doctors, nurses and teacher make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sport celebrities. Do you agree or disagree?

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**IELTS Writing Task 2:** In contemporary
society
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, there is a burgeoning debate regarding the appropriate remuneration for
professionals
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in different fields.
While
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some argue that
doctors
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,
nurses
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, and
teachers
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,
due to
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their indispensable societal
contributions
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, deserve higher pay than
entertainment
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and
sports
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celebrities
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, others hold a divergent perspective. In
this
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essay, I will discuss both viewpoints and provide my own analysis. On the one hand, proponents of the notion that healthcare and
education
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professionals
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merit higher salaries often underscore the critical roles they play in the betterment of
society
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.
Doctors
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and
nurses
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are entrusted with the monumental task of safeguarding public health, often working long hours under challenging conditions to save lives and alleviate suffering.
Similarly
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,
teachers
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shape the future by imparting knowledge and fostering the intellectual and moral development of young minds. Given the gravity of their responsibilities and the profound impact of their work, it seems logical to prioritize their financial compensation.
Conversely
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, those who contend that
entertainment
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and
sports
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celebrities
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should command higher salaries argue from the standpoint of market demand and societal preferences.
Celebrities
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in these fields often amass immense wealth
due to
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their popularity and the substantial revenues generated by
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entertainment
Correct article usage
the entertainment
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and
sports
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industries. Ticket sales, advertising deals, and merchandise sales contribute to their astronomical earnings, reflecting the significant demand for their talents and the widespread societal interest in
entertainment
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and
sports
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. From
this
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perspective, their salaries are justified by market forces and consumer preferences.
However
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, it is essential to consider the broader implications of remuneration disparities.
While
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entertainment
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and
sports
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celebrities
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undoubtedly entertain and inspire millions, the
contributions
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of
doctors
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,
nurses
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, and
teachers
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are foundational to the functioning and progress of
society
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. Without accessible healthcare and quality
education
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, societal well-being and advancement would be severely compromised.
Therefore
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, it is arguable that
professionals
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who directly contribute to the health,
education
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, and welfare of
society
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should be rewarded commensurately
with
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for
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their indispensable roles. In conclusion, the debate over whether
doctors
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,
nurses
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, and
teachers
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should be paid more than
entertainment
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and
sports
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celebrities
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encapsulates complex considerations of societal value, market dynamics, and individual
contributions
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.
While
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entertainment
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and
sports
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figures play important roles in
society
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, the foundational
contributions
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of healthcare and
education
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professionals
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cannot be overstated. Ultimately, a fair and equitable compensation system should recognize and reward the diverse
contributions
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that different professions make to the betterment of
society
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.
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task achievement
To strengthen your essay further, consider incorporating more specific examples and data, which could substantiate your arguments more effectively and enhance your Task Achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that your paragraphs are well-balanced. While your coherence and cohesion are strong, ensuring that all points are equally developed can improve your score in this criterion.
coherence cohesion
Your logical structure is very good, and your essay reads cohesively from start to finish. You have clear introductions, well-developed body paragraphs, and a fitting conclusion.
task achievement
The response thoroughly addresses the essay prompt and offers an insightful analysis of both viewpoints along with your conclusion.
task achievement
Your ideas are comprehensive and clearly articulated, making your arguments easy to follow and compelling.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • critical role
  • healthcare professionals
  • societal well-being
  • disparity in income
  • skewed values
  • essential services
  • remuneration
  • mitigate
  • global shortages
  • inherent value
  • nurturing
  • compensation
  • societal contributions
  • profound impact
  • equitable distribution
What to do next:
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