Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, movies on gadgets,
such
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as phones and tablets, play more important roles in people's lifestyles. Whilst some societies say that watching movies on these gadgets from various streaming platforms is enjoyable enough, others contest that to mostly sink into the films, it is needed to be watched in the
cinema
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. In my point of view, I personally agree that motion pictures should be watched in the
cinema
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for 3 main reasons.
Firstly
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, the vibes in
cinema
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play the most important role in making a
movie
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enjoyable. The dark rooms with high-definition screens and surrounding sound push the capacity of the movies to their maximum. The special effects of the film will be in maximum strength only when we watch it in a
movie
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theatre
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.
Furthermore
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, the crowds who watch the flick together
also
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make the show more enjoyable. To illustrate, when the show is funny and there are many folks laughing with us can make the scenes more revelry. The second reason is you can watch a
movie
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in a
theatre
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long before it’s out for showing on other platforms at home. As soon as the
movie
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is shown, there are going to be numerous spoilers all over the internet, which can spoil our mood if we read it without intention. Watching a
movie
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in a
cinema
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on the very first day of the show is the best way to avoid these spoilers and enjoy the
movie
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the most.
Last
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but not least, for some folk who are keen to watch the
movie
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alone (like me), the
theatre
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is the best place to cry during sad film scenes without embarrassment.
In contrast
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, watching videotapes on gadgets with your family at home will not give as intense emotion as it is in
movie
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houses.
To sum up
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, I strongly support that flicks should be watched in theatres for 3 reasons, the vibes in
theatre
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are more enjoyable, the motion pictures shown in
movie
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theatres long before in other streaming platforms, the emotional expressions are more free to do in the troupe.
Submitted by thirdd.natcha on

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Task Achievement
Your essay addresses the task requirements adequately and provides a clear position on the issue. However, it could benefit from a more balanced discussion that gives equal weight to both sides of the argument. Ensure that you discuss the opposing viewpoint in more detail to provide a more comprehensive response.
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Your ideas are generally well-organized, but there are some lapses in coherence and cohesion, particularly in the first and second body paragraphs. Try to use more linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay. Consider organizing your points more logically to ensure a clearer structure.
Coherence and Cohesion
Some of your main points lack specific examples to support them. Providing more concrete examples can strengthen your arguments. Additionally, you should make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to maintain coherence.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your argument effectively.
Task Achievement
You have a strong personal stance, and your arguments are generally clear and relevant to the topic.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Convenience
  • Mobile Viewing
  • Cost-efficient
  • Time-efficient
  • Personalized experience
  • Immersive
  • Cinematic experience
  • Surround sound
  • Collective experience
  • Technical superiority
  • Sensory experience
  • Social hubs
  • Cultural events
  • Distractions
  • Preservation
  • Filmmaking art
  • Cinematographic nuances
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