In some countries, students live at home with their family while they study at university, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do the advantages of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?

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Before entering the
university
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, graduates choose one of the options:whether
study
Fix the infinitive
to study

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

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in their hometown or go to
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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university
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

which is located in another town. From my point of view, living away from close people during
university
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

studies brings
much
Fix the agreement mistake
many

It seems that much may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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more advantages than downsides. There is no doubt that studying away from home has minor side effects, which for some people will be taken seriously.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the vast majority of parents worry about their children's safety.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are no guarantees for the well-being of students in undeveloped countries.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, teenagers are not yet adults with a lot of experience.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they can easily join a bad society since there is no supervision from the parents. Turning to the other side of the argument, teenagers will take more responsibility for their lives, not depending on their parents.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, students will be more focused on their studies. Because there will be no distractions
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as family outings,house chores etc.
Besides
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, getting out of their comfort zone is the best way to expand their horizon. Teenagers will acquire new skills and adapt to new
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments

It seems that environment may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, an Indian student who is studying in Kazakhstan who learn the culture and traditions of Kazakh which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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totally different from he is own and
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

will help their future career. By way of conclusion,
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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benefits of staying away from loved ones during
university
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

studies are enormous,including better concentration on reading,
cultural
Correct word choice
and cultural

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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diversity.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,in spite of that there are a few demerits including risking life and lack of supervision.
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grammar
Correct minor grammatical errors and typos (e.g., replace 'study' with 'studying' in the first sentence).
vocabulary
Improve vocabulary to enhance clarity and precision, such as replacing 'downsides' with 'disadvantages'.
cohesion
Ensure the essay transitions smoothly between ideas and paragraphs for enhanced cohesion.
structure
The essay presents a clear and focused introduction and conclusion, outlining the main topic and summarizing the key arguments.
task response
The essay discusses both advantages and disadvantages of living away from home, exhibiting a balanced view.
support
The use of examples to illustrate key points, such as the Indian student in Kazakhstan, adds depth to the argument.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fosters independence
  • self-reliance
  • essential life skills
  • cultural backgrounds
  • academic performance
  • resilience
  • adaptability
  • financially burdensome
  • homesickness
  • emotional stress
  • mental health
  • familial support
  • isolation and loneliness
  • stable and supportive environment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: