Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? What are the effects of this on society and families?
Delaying childbirth is a common trend nowadays,
while
most people
are biologically able to have children in their teen years, it became common sense to not have kids until late in life, due to
various reasons such
as reaching financial stability, getting higher education, or simply trying new experiences without being tied by the responsibilities of having to raise a kid, this
tendency has its effects on the society, and in this
essay, I will be discussing how it can affect the structure of families.
Regarding the reasons, it is a very individualized decision, during all the human history people
tended to reproduce at a young age due to
fear of fertility issues, especially for women. In contrast
, today with all the advanced medical technologies like IVF and egg freezing, this
fear has diminished, and people
are more aware of how much it costs to have kids in today’s capitalism. Furthermore
, I once stumbled upon a study discussing that the expansion of psychological knowledge regarding the impact of childhood traumas and the impact of a good upbringing, had made people
more conscious about making this
decision only when they are finally
stable enough to ensure the right environment for child-rearing.
This
phenomenon resulted in reversing the population pyramid upside down, meaning that there is an increase in geriatrics compared to youth, which incurs a decline in the workforce and an upward strike in healthcare expenses in many countries like South Korea. Many governments are trying to conquer the long-term effects by offering financial and social support for new parents to encourage the birthrate
with minimal results. Correct your spelling
birth rate
As a result
, many countries like Germeny
became highly dependent on skilled immigrants to push the economy.
In conclusion, though the quantity of newborn population is in decline, the quality of their childhood is improving, issues like childhood abuse and neglect will be of the past, as only the person who is fully ready to welcome a child in their arms and give them all what they need and deserve will be a parent, imagine a world where everybody is fully loved by their parents, Correct your spelling
Germany
that is
a utopia indeed.Submitted by maryamansour11 on
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task achievement
You have provided a complete response to the prompt and touched on key reasons and effects of delaying childbirth. However, try to provide more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring a clear logical structure throughout your essay. While the essay is generally well-organized, some ideas could be connected more fluently.
general
Focus on further developing your main points. Adding more supporting details can help clarify and strengthen your arguments.
introduction conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively frame the essay’s content. Good job on smoothly transitioning between ideas.
task achievement
The response comprehensively addresses both the reasons and the effects of delaying childbirth. This shows a good understanding of the task requirements.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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