New parents should attend parenting courses to ensure the growth of.their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Of all the worries young couples often have, perhaps the most incessant one is about whether they are prepared to raise their

children

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This

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has led some to believe that newly-wed couples should attend parenthood preparation

courses

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to best rear their

children

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, and I personally think that there is little to disagree with in

this

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observation. Granted, one might argue that it is unnecessary for young married couples to take parental lessons to teach

children

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This

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is predicated on the assumption that we can gain these skills from our older family members,

such

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as our

parents

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and grandparents.

According to

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this

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theory, our ancestors have done

this

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for thousands of years without any formal support or the intervention of a taught course.

In addition

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, what works for a child may not work for others, so perhaps it is better for adults to get to know their own

children

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. By observing and trying different strategies, good

parents

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will gradually develop a parenting method that best facilitates the development of their

children

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However

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this

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line of reasoning is not sound since many arguably traditional child-rearing practices are scientifically proven to be detrimental. Newborn babies in Vietnam,

for example

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, are often kept away from the sunlight during the first month because

this

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is believed to boost their immune system,

while

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the opposite is the case.

Thus

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, parenting

courses

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are an ideal vehicle to dispel

such

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misconceptions.

Although

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it is true that we can now read books or online articles about parenting, there is no way to verify the information.

By contrast

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, young

parents

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can learn from real experts in childcare when they participate in parental

courses

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. In conclusion, to ensure the growth of their offspring, newly married

parents

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should set aside some time to attend parental training

courses

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because

such

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courses

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help prospective

parents

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avoid unorthodox and potentially harmful practices, and unnecessary risks when raising their

children

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lenam2k1Sat May 25 2024

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task achievement

Work on further reinforcing your argument with more specific examples to strengthen your essay. While the essay has good points, more real-life evidence could make it even stronger.

coherence cohesion

Ensure every paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Although your logical structure is good, minor improvements can make your essay even more cohesive.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction clearly sets the stage for your essay, presenting the topic effectively and engagingly.

task achievement

You provide clear and comprehensive ideas that are well-supported with relevant points.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your argument and reinforces your main points.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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New parents should attend parenting courses to ensure the growth of.their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is a good idea that older people continue to work if it is possible for them to do. Do you agree or disagree?

While choosing a job, the salary is the most important consideration.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

## 문제 Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion. (2)