IELTS essay, topic: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Several
museums
ask for an entry fee for their visitor, whereas
some of them give no charge
at all. However
, this
seems to be quite arguable for the public. In this
essay, I will explain some benefits given by an administration fee to the visitor that surpass the drawbacks.
The paid museums
use their admission charge
as a main income for the art's maintenance cost. Arts such
as sculptures, artefacts, or paintings that have been curated in a museum
must be popular, meaningful, and precious. Nevertheless
, since they are fragile objects, the museum
's committee should keep them in a very well condition so they could be long-lasting and able to be seen by future generations. Moreover
, we know that museums
have been used as an educational resource for schools to illustrate past phenomena. Other than that, the charge
will also
enable the committee to hold an interesting event and make the walk-in journey more interactive for the visitors. As an impact, the visitors could be both educated and entertained when go to the museum
. This
means paying an admission fee will become a way to preserve the artefact as well as
increase the experience
.
However
, the idea of a paid museum
could make it less attractive to a particular segment of customers. They will continuously compare it to the free one and make reasons to not look in. This
most likely happens to the group that doesn't value art and history and just goes there for fun. As an impact, the museums
will lose some of their previous customers. To handle this
situation, they could offer not only a sightseeing experience
, but also
a live attraction, such
as music, guards with costumes, narrative speakers, or movies that relate to the object. With this
method, people who at first are reluctant because of the money will think it is a valuable experience
that is
worth the cost.
In conclusion, an admission charge
will benefit the museum
and the customer as well. The museum
will have an income for maintenance and to please the customer. On the other hand
, the transition from free to paid would risk them a loss of visitors, but as long as the museum
is able to offer a new experience
, it will attract the right customers.Submitted by evaagustine11 on
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task achievement
The essay generally addresses the prompt well, presenting both sides of the argument and providing a stance. However, some arguments could be developed further with more specific examples.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear primary idea and that transitions between ideas are smooth. The essay has a good structure but could benefit from clearer topic sentences in some paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a clear and logical structure, with a defined introduction, body, and conclusion.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear and comprehensive, making the argument easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes relevant specific examples to support its main points, enhancing the argument.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...