The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you disagree or disagree with this statement?
To embark on,
science
can make our life
more straightforward in communication and working which is obvious, if you compare (compare to) past era
and these days. A good example of it would be, that we are used to using mobile and Fix the agreement mistake
eras
laptop
to communicate remotely which was not (didn’t) available former (in the past) and teachings and businesses can be done without in the flesh (remotely). Fix the agreement mistake
laptops
Moreover
, the more science
break throw
( goes forward) the artificial intelligence will be more Correct your spelling
breakthrough
advance
rather than it used to be which causes many of Replace the word
advanced
works
can be done without human intervention which can Correct article usage
the works
also
reduce human error.
Thirdly
, Another interesting aim of science
is that it affects directly in
Change preposition
apply
society
infrastructure and improves Change noun form
society's
life
expectancy. In fact, whenever science
improves the standard of life
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
accordingly
. As an example, in the past, remedy was done with homoeopathy and it took a long time, but the more science
develops the remedy will be easier by prescribing some advanced pills.
All in all, as can be seen from the points in this
essay, humans always try to improve their life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
which
improving Correct pronoun usage
apply
of
everything depends on knowledge. In fact, Remove the preposition
apply
science
not only makes our life
more straightforward,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
improves life
speed. In other words
, we are continuing our life
without any concern.Submitted by hoseinyasemi.ir on
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the prompt and introduces relevant arguments, but it lacks an introduction. Start with an introduction to present the topic and your stance clearly.
task achievement
Some points are not fully explained, such as how artificial intelligence will reduce human error. Provide more detailed explanations and specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Improve your logical flow by making sure each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence and maintaining a consistent structure throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on using transitional words and phrases to ensure a smoother flow between sentences and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Make sure your conclusion summarizes the key points you have discussed and reinforces your stance on the topic.
task achievement
The essay covers relevant points such as the impact of science on communication, work, and healthcare.
task achievement
Your essay demonstrates a clear attempt to connect science with improvements in daily life, which is a strong aspect of the task.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains some good ideas and examples of how scientific advancements can affect everyday life.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.