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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

These days, many university courses are offered through the internet. Some people think that online teaching has more advantages than conventional classroom teaching or lectures, while others claim that there are significant disadvantages. Do the benefits of online teaching outweigh the disadvantages?

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In today's world, online teaching
platforms
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 have become a popular tendency and play a significant role in learning methods.
While
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 some argue that online
platforms
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 save much
time
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 on commuting and are better than the conventional teaching
ways
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 in the classroom, others contend that learning through the internet has significant drawbacks,
such
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 as easily getting distracted by other things. In
this
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 context, I suppose that the advantages of online lessons outweigh real
lectures
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. On the one hand, learners living in barren areas have limited learning resources, in
this
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 case, online learning provides a better choice that not only saves commuting
time
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 but
also
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 offers ample options.
Additionally
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, they can learn from different
ways
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 and tutors, and the price of online learning is usually cheaper than traditional
lectures
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 in the classroom.
For instance
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, in Taiwan, nearly 80% of learners tend to have classes through the Internet, leading to a balance between personal
time
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 and work.
Therefore
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, choosing an online learning platform indeed has many pros for learners.
On the other hand
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, physical
lectures
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 play a meaningful role in the way of learning, especially for those who are inclined to traditional methods of learning or the elderly. These groups feel more enjoyable for mutual interactions in person through face-to-face teaching
ways
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, and some of them even are not familiar with using computers or laptops. For illustrate, in Japan, nearly 20% of the elderly tend to join physical
lectures
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,
such
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 as community colleges,
instead
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 of attending courses on the Internet to seek friendships among the ones they meet in the classroom.
Hence
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, traditional
ways
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 of learning like physical institutions provide specific groups,
such
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 as having preferences for physical teaching.
Consequently
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, I believe that online
platforms
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 outweigh the conventional
ways
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 of learning. In conclusion, both sides of learning online and physical lessons have their advantages and disadvantages. I suppose that online
platforms
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 have more pros compared to physical places, leading to not wasting
time
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 on transportation and saving more personal
time
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.

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task response
Maintain focus on the essay question throughout, ensuring clarity in your response to whether the benefits outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence
Work on smoother transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay.
cohesion
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points; this will strengthen your arguments.
task response
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and presents a clear thesis statement.
coherence
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points, reaffirming your stance that online platforms have more pros.
cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with distinct paragraphs discussing different aspects of online and traditional learning.
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