Social media has become a real problem for some young people today, and governments should create laws that allow only people over 18 years of age to have accounts. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#media #people #governments #laws #years #age #accounts

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Nowadays, the number of social

media

Use synonyms

users

Use synonyms

is countless, and it poses significant problems for the younger generation.

Therefore

Linking Words

, some propose that governments should create official rules that permit only those over 18 years old to use these platforms. I partly agree with

this

Linking Words

statement;

however

Linking Words

, its merits and drawbacks should be considered. On the one hand, it is undeniable that social

media

Use synonyms

can be harmful to the education and development of young people. They often do not understand the power or influence of their online actions, which can unintentionally lead to insulting others.

For example

Linking Words

, in face-to-face communication, a person might say something only to those around them.

In contrast

Linking Words

, if someone posts the same thing on social

media

Use synonyms

, it can become a significant issue because everyone can see it.

Therefore

Linking Words

, young

users

Use synonyms

, who may not understand the consequences of their words, should be restricted from using these platforms.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are benefits to allowing

users

Use synonyms

under 18 to access social

media

Use synonyms

. They can obtain information faster than through traditional

media

Use synonyms

like newspapers or TV.

For instance

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

TV might report an accident several hours after it happens,

users

Use synonyms

can post about it on Twitter within minutes.

This

Linking Words

rapid access to information is particularly beneficial during natural disasters when timely updates are crucial. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

there are specific downsides to social

media

Use synonyms

, its advantages are

also

Linking Words

significant.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I believe that governments should carefully weigh the pros and cons and create appropriate regulations.

Submitted by ryoga17.0325 on Mon May 27 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which is great. However, you could further enhance your argument by providing more detailed examples to support your points. More specific case studies or statistics can make your argument more persuasive.

task achievement

While your ideas are mostly clear and well-organized, try to further clarify and elaborate on your main points to increase comprehensiveness. Dive deeper into why social media can be harmful or beneficial and consider potential counterarguments.

coherence cohesion

Your essay maintains a logical structure, but transitions between some paragraphs could be smoother. Consider using more connecting phrases or words to better link your ideas and paragraphs together for improved cohesion.

coherence cohesion

Your essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction outlining your partial agreement, followed by body paragraphs discussing both sides, and a concise conclusion summarizing your stance.

task achievement

Your argument is balanced, addressing both the potential harm and benefits of social media for young users, which shows a nuanced understanding of the issue.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

248 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays most people find jopes out side thier cities, which couse them to stay away from there family and friends. Some people may argue that moving away from family and friends has a postive effects on your future. Others may believe that this development has more side effects . In my opinion, moving away from family has more advantages rather than disadvantages to a persone future.
6.5
band
Some pp believe that public buildings should be moved out ò the city to promote citizen's well being and better economic growing, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There was a plan that public buildings should be moved out of the city. It can lead to two main benefits including both providing citizen's health and supporting more for economic growth. While some argue that planning will cause more harm than good, I stand in the opposite mind. From my point of view, that plan has more advantages than disadvantages.
7
band
Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Many people thought that big issues of the situation like poorness and other socialist activities, although others people believed that most of the family members are poorly reputation by the globe. This essay agrees with the latter point and will show that the creation does not flow to the men by the natural climate, as the potential change by the social platform used by timely maintained.
5
band
In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?
With an ever-increasing concern about how to handle double-sideness of internet, some individuals argue that internet will bring positive outcomes in society for some reasons. This essay will, however, provide some reasons why I firmly believe that it will not be beneficial for the society.
5.5
band
Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.
Information is very important for all of the people, companies and governments. I strongly support that information in these restricted areas( science, business and academic) should be shared freely, although some people think information about this is too risky or too wasteful to be searched without payment.

Social media has become a real problem for some young people today, and governments should create laws that allow only people over 18 years of age to have accounts. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Word Count

In many countries today, if people want to find work, they have to move away from their friends and their families. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

Some pp believe that public buildings should be moved out ò the city to promote citizen's well being and better economic growing, while some argue that the planning will cause more harm than good. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think most crimes are the result of circumstances like poverty and other social problems. Others believe that they are caused by people who are bad in nature. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?