IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In the past people liked to store knowledge in books. However, in the present, we prefer to store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that in
this
Linking Words
 day and age, opinion is divided over whether people ought to store their
information
Use synonyms
 in to book rather than Internet. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will look at both sides of
this
Linking Words
 debate
as well as
Linking Words
 offer my own point of view. Turning first of all to the disadvantages of saving knowledge on the internet, it goes without saying that
books
Use synonyms
 can be stored for a long term.
For instance
Linking Words
, most historical writings and religious writings
such
Linking Words
 as the Bible have
also
Linking Words
 been preserved as
books
Use synonyms
 in the past. At the same time,
books
Use synonyms
 already have a proven track record as
information
Use synonyms
 recording media.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
books
Use synonyms
 published by reputable authors and publishers tend to be more reliable sources of
information
Use synonyms
 compared to some unverified online content. As far as the other side of
this
Linking Words
 debate is concerned, it is generally acknowledged that the internet allows people to store
information
Use synonyms
 that every individual can view and every person can record
information
Use synonyms
. It may
also
Linking Words
 be worth noting that digital storage requires less physical space compared to storing numerous
books
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, a library has stored plenty of
books
Use synonyms
 and
information
Use synonyms
,
by
Linking Words
contrast
Add the comma(s)
contrast,
show examples
 one digital device can cover one library
information
Use synonyms
 or more. By way of conclusion, from the ideas and examples above, it can be seen that there are valid arguments on both sides of
this
Linking Words
 debate.
However
Linking Words
, I am of the opinion that in the grand scheme of things,
books
Use synonyms
 have their place as an
information
Use synonyms
 recording medium.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Your essay covers both sides of the debate effectively, but make sure each point is directly relevant to the central question posed by the task. Focus on clearly relating the examples to the advantages and disadvantages of storing knowledge on the internet.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay maintains a good logical structure and includes clear introductory and concluding paragraphs. However, work on smoothing the transitions between points to enhance the overall flow of your writing.
introduction and conclusion
Your introduction sets the stage well by clearly outlining the purpose of the essay, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, giving a balanced view of the debate.
supported main points
You provide valid and relevant examples to support your points, which adds depth to your arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • digital storage
  • environmental impact
  • information overload
  • reliable sources
  • reputable authors
  • searchability
  • contradictory information
  • physical space
  • knowledge preservation
  • publishing standards
  • digital divide
What to do next:
Look at other essays: