modern technology has become an important part of people's lives around the world. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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In
this
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digital era, modern
technology
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has played a vital role in
people
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's lives. The writer of
this
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essay believes that the benefits of
this
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including saving
time
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and supporting
people
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in studying outweigh the reliance on
technology
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. The most advantageous factor of advanced
technology
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is saving
time
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. Nowadays, a lot of smart devices have been invented to help
people
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do simple work. These inventions
also
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provide
time
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for users to do important projects. The most common machine being used is the washing machine. It
also
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helps their owners to wash the dishes and reduce unnecessary
time
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. Another
pros
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pro
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of modern
technology
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is supporting studying.
This
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technology
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encourages learners to think more creatively. It must be recognized that the development of
technology
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also
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provides more sources of information.
People
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can easily find the knowledge
which
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apply
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they need on the internet or use AI to find the information. Take chat GPT as an example,
this
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application provides a massive amount of information to
people
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and
also
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helps them to find the answers that they need.
In contrast
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, there are some cons of modern
technology
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. One of those is the replacement.
Due to
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the convenience of
technology
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, a lot of companies have applied it and it leads to unemployment.
This
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issue may become a social devil. Take countries in Europe as an example, a lot of
business
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businesses
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prefer using machines to
people
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to save money. In conclusion,
while
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there are some disadvantages the advantages are still more.
Therefore
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,
this
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writer believes that advanced
technology
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outweighs its drawbacks.
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Grammar
Try to avoid minor mistakes such as 'Another pros' which should be 'Another pro' or 'Another advantage.' Also, 'a lot of business prefer' should be 'a lot of businesses prefer.'
Task Achievement
Ensure that each main point is fully supported with detailed explanations and examples. For instance, when discussing the disadvantages, more specific details and examples about how technology leads to unemployment would strengthen the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on the transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve the flow. For example, when moving from discussing advantages to disadvantages, clearer transitional phrases would help the reader follow your argument more easily.
Structure
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Relevance
The main points are relevant to the topic and provide a balanced view of both advantages and disadvantages of modern technology.
Specific Examples
The use of specific examples such as the washing machine and chat GPT enhances the reader's understanding of the points made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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