You have recently been on a business trip to see some equipment that your company needs. Write a letter to the company that owns this equipment and say: • Describe the equipment • Ask for features and specifications of this equipment • Explain why your company needs this equipment
I am writing in connection with some
equipment
that our company need. I have recently been on a business trip in order to see different types of printers, laptops, monitors and keyboards that your company owns. Therefore
, I wish to know more about the features of each one.
I would appreciate it if you were aware of the features and specifications of this
equipment
. It could help me to make a suitable decision about the amount of money I should pay for them.
To explain more, Because of changing the decoration of our office
we need more Add a comma
office,
equipment
including printers and laptops. In addition
, some of them are out of date and they should be replaced with modern equipment
. For example
, our keyboards are old and we need to change them with a wireless one. On the other hand
, our monitor is broken and a new one should be equipped.
I hope you take my modest proposal consideration
.
Yours faithfully,
Mah KarChange preposition
into consideration
Submitted by kargar.mh1992 on
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task achievement
Try to be more specific about the features you need to know about the equipment. Instead of generalizing, ask for the exact specifications for the printers, laptops, monitors, and keyboards individually.
coherence cohesion
The letter could be more logically structured. For example, the request for features and specifications should be placed after the description of the equipment, followed by the explanation of need. This would make your argument more logical and easier to follow.
task achievement
Your tone is appropriate and professional for a business letter. This is good practice for formal correspondence.
coherence cohesion
You have included a greeting and a closing, which is important for a formal letter. This adds to the completeness and professionalism of your letter.
The Greeting
Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.
Always start an informal letter in the ways:
- Dear + name
- Hi / Hello + name
‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.
For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:
- Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
- Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.
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