In some cities, public parks and open spaces are changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do you think the benefits outweigh the disadvantages?
Whether using land in the public becomes agriculture is a recurring argument.
This
writer argues that the benefits of improving life habits and avoiding inactive lifestyles outweigh the drawbacks of being toxic to the environment.
The most advantageous factor of growing produce and vegetables is that can help raise awareness of healthy food. In other words
, a balanced lifestyle will be common in the young generation instead
of consuming fast food. From prior knowledge, the number of calories in fruit can provide fresh energy after a hard-working day for workers who have hectic schedules. For example
, there are various methods to coo vegetables and planning menus like scientists’ advice encourage
citizens to keep fit and flexible activities.
Sedentary style must Change the verb form
encourages
also
be considered. It must be recognized that working as farmers in cities can create new experiences and connect people from different places. As a result
, community activities which reduce stress and negative emotions also
help humans familiar with their environment. Thereby, local residents plant healthy crop
have a big impact on society.
Fix the agreement mistake
crops
However
, the majority of individuals think that product growth uses fertilizers which have a detrimental effect on the environment. This
is because the rate of consuming healthy is rising in recent years so adapting to demands
of citizens is a hard issue for governments. Correct article usage
the demands
This
may be true, but the balance between public parks and soil in order to grow use is concern
. Add an article
a concern
Consequently
, avoiding effects on the atmosphere is suitable to develop
a healthy industry.
Taking all points into account, the possible impact of negative impacts on the ecosystem are outweighed by social activities to access the distance between individuals. Change preposition
for developing
Hence
, growing vegetables in urban areas have positive results in the community.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow of your arguments. Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next.
task achievement
Provide more specific and detailed examples to strengthen your points and make your arguments more convincing.
clear comprehensive ideas
Avoid using complex or confusing sentence structures. Instead, aim for clear and concise sentences to enhance readability.
task achievement
You presented a complete response to the prompt, addressing multiple aspects of the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, which provides a good framework for your essay.
task achievement
Your essay contains some clear and comprehensive ideas, showing your understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.