Some companies sponsor sports to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many physical sports are funded by entrepreneurs to advertise their
companies
in
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apply
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nowadays.
People
have different views about
this
phenomenon. From my perspective, it yields negative impacts both on society and their
companies
,
although
it may boost their sales. To commence, drawing upon
sport
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sports
show examples
competitions to advertise
companys'
Correct your spelling
companies'
products
would be beneficial to factories' revenue.
This
is because those activities, especially
Olympics
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the Olympics
show examples
, may arouse
many
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apply
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attention from individuals. If
products
are presented in the playground or inserted
in
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during
show examples
the
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apply
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break time,
the
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their
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standard of fame
of
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apply
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them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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would be enhanced.
Consequently
, there would be more
people
notice
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noticing
show examples
the brand,
as well as
the goods, inspiring their desire to purchase it. Based on that,
companies
gain more revenue and the profit
get
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gets
show examples
broaden
Wrong verb form
broadened
show examples
. Apart from that, it can
also
leave audiences
positive
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a positive
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impression about their goods because those
products
have to be tested by competition holders to make sure they are harmless.
For example
, some functional
beverage
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beverages
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are supposed to be proved useful and side effects free before they show up to the stadium.
Therefore
,
people
prefer to choose those verified
prodcuts
Correct your spelling
products
rather than others.
By contrast
, the disadvantages should not be neglected.
First,
in
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apply
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most time, it is
considerd
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considered
to be
unnecessary
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an unnecessary
show examples
expenditure for
companies
because that part
money
are
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is
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supposed to be invested in more significant aspects. The main reason is that sponsor
fee
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fees
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always need a large portion of
money
, and those
investment
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investments
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are seemed
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seem
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less important compared to the innovation of
products
, which
is
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are
show examples
the core factors to make
companies
competitive.
Second,
some consumers are highly likely to
be mislead
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be misled
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by
those advertisement
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that advertisement
those advertisements
show examples
,
over spending
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overspending
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their
money
, resulting
the
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in the
show examples
waste of social resources.
For example
, some fans of football are prone to buy the same equipment as the advertisement
attribute
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attributes
show examples
the great performance of players to their
products
. In that case,
people
are willing to spend
money
on the new devices
instead
of considering
its
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their
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true usage, which makes the
money
over consumed
Add a hyphen
over-consumed
show examples
. In conclusion, it may
enhace
Correct your spelling
enhance
companies
' income and make
it
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them
show examples
be trusted by individuals,
the
Correct word choice
but the
show examples
unappropriate
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inappropriate
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distribution of
money
and wastage of resources far outweigh
benefits
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the benefits
show examples
.
Submitted by 1356388645 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow and transitions between sentences and paragraphs. For example, ensure consistent use of linking words and phrases to help guide the reader from one idea to the next.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity and expression of ideas. Ensure every main point is fully expanded with detailed explanations, and that relevant examples are more explicitly connected to your arguments. For instance, include specific details on how sports sponsorship boosts sales or the tangible disadvantages of such expenditures.
task achievement
The essay addresses both perspectives on the topic and provides a clear opinion in the conclusion. This demonstrates a balanced approach and complete response to the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly identifiable, which frames the essay well. This is essential in helping the reader understand the flow of arguments.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sports sponsorship
  • financial support
  • athletes
  • brand visibility
  • awareness
  • commercialization
  • integrity
  • dependencies
  • corporate funds
  • unethical practices
  • strategic partnerships
  • communal relations
  • promote healthy lifestyles
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