Health experts say that walking is a good way to improve the health of the general public, but nowadays people are walking less than every before. What are the causes? What measures could be effective?
Health has a significant role in human life. So, by some exercise like walking, they will have a normal life and improve it.
However
, in the early days
Add a comma
days,
people
don’t walking
/walk more than in the past. There are some causes why Change the verb form
walk
people
are walking less and the effect of this
.
Nowadays improving transportation
led to people
walking less that’s why in most countries public transportation
is free, so people
prefer to use
it. For instance
, Australia is one of the countries which it has public transportation
and people
prefer to use
it inside of walking. Secondly
, saving time for individuals especially
for employment and students time is important because Add the comma(s)
, especially
of
they don’t prefer to walk to arrive at school or the office, so they want to Change preposition
apply
use
their own cars or public transportation
.
The effect of this
case making a more professional park
. The park
and its space are very important. Moreover
, if these parks designed
with the best quality like growing flowers around the Add a missing verb
are designed
park
some chairs with tables and a special part for children which
they can play. So, Change preposition
in which
people
walking around the park
make
feel relaxed and refreshed. Verb problem
apply
Furthermore
, the government should increase the price of public transport or give advertising for people
and encourage them to improve their walking.
In conclusion, the cause of less walking which people
prefer to use
more public transport. However
, by increased
of income Change the form of the verb
increasing
government
Correct article usage
the government
con
encourage Correct your spelling
can
people
to walking
.Change the verb form
walk
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task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that your essay answers all parts of the prompt thoroughly. In this essay, the causes and measures are discussed, but there could be more depth in explaining the impacts and additional realistic measures.
task achievement
Your ideas could be clearer and more comprehensive. Try to develop each main point in more detail, explaining the significance clearly.
task achievement
Use more relevant and specific examples to support your points. For instance, mentioning specific studies or statistics regarding walking habits or health benefits could strengthen your essay.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, improve the logical structure by making smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. Each paragraph should flow logically into the next.
coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a more elaborate introduction and conclusion. Ensure each paragraph connects to the next with clear linking words or phrases.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each main point is well-supported with evidence and examples to provide clarity and depth to your argument.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion which frame the essay well.
task achievement
You have identified and addressed the causes of people walking less and suggested measures to improve this situation, which shows good understanding of the task.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...