Most countries want to improve standard of living through economic development, however, others think social value is lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Improving the standard of living based on economic development is going to be popular in the majority of countries, which leads to a loss of social values.
However
Linking Words
, benefits can manage dozens of obstacles for each country leading to economic progress . There are several advantages of having rapid economic growth to fulfil human needs.
First,
Linking Words
it could increase the consumption of goods and services which is related to utility, with higher consumption levels, there is greater prosperity.
Moreover
Linking Words
, public services for society would be improved, including health and education. It can be said that the government could provide the highest quality of health care by tre
ating
Correct your spelling
dating
disease and assuring life expectancy.
Also
Linking Words
, improving the educational standards could contribute to the population a great diversity of skills and literacy. By
this
Linking Words
means, economic development becomes essential to most countries for welfare and happiness.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, every coin has two sides and despite all the advantages of developed economies, there are some disadvantages too. People argue that
this
Linking Words
could lead to the loss of social values because high economic growth is directly creating injustice among the poor and rich communities.
This
Linking Words
imbalance would partially impact the social discrepancy.
Besides
Linking Words
, humanity and morality
also
Linking Words
would be lower since they only depend on materialism which refers to disrespect to the poor members.
For instance
Linking Words
, the wealthy community could not have any tolerance to build a relationship,
such
Linking Words
as helping the poor people as one of the social values too, other than economic aspect. In conclusion, the staple movement of a country as economic value for standard living, including the increment of consumption and public services that are needed by a number of countries, have no more long-run value than humanity and moral aspects. I believe that the benefits of economic growth could merely belong to the rich community, and it does not ensure the poorer inhabitants have prosperity too.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Expand on the disadvantages by providing more specific examples and elaborate further on the impact on social values.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are generally clear, some sentences are awkwardly structured. Aim to write more fluidly by using varied sentence structures and keeping sentences concise.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical flow between paragraphs. Using transitional phrases or linking words can make transitions smoother.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are both present, summarizing your key points effectively.
complete response
You have provided points and counterpoints, showing an understanding of the topic's complexities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: