Animals should not be used for the benefit of human beings unless there is evidence that the animals do not suffer in any way. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Recently people
are
Wrong verb form
have been
show examples
divided into two categories in response to a question should
animals
not be used for the benefit of human
beings
unless there is evidence that the
animals
do not suffer in any way
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
The pro group says that we may utilize
animals
in order to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
their needs because human
beings
are part of
food
chains
. The contra group says that we cannot use
animals
for our benefit because every
creatures
Change to a singular noun
creature
show examples
has the
right
to life in
this
worls
Correct your spelling
world
. The debates still happening
right
now, but every
groups
Change to a singular noun
group
show examples
has
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own assumptions and justifications.
In biology
Replace the word
From a biological
show examples
perspective human
beings
are considered
belongs
Change the verb form
to belong
show examples
to
animal
Add an article
the animal
show examples
kingdom. So, it is natural that
animals
tend to eat each other
which
Correct word choice
and
show examples
the more powerful will prey
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
less powerful animal. It is what we
called
Wrong verb form
call
show examples
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
food
chains
Fix the agreement mistake
chain
show examples
. In
this
context
Add a comma
context,
show examples
we can not say
right
and wrong because it is a natural
facts
Change the noun form
fact
show examples
.
In addition
,
this
accurence
Correct your spelling
occurrence
assurance
keep
Correct subject-verb agreement
keeps
show examples
our universe in balance. The predators usually cannot reproduce as many as the
lower level
Add a hyphen
lower-level
show examples
consumers
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
so the producers will reproduce more than their consumers.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
the predators is the highest rank in
food
chains
,
who
Correct word choice
and
show examples
will prey
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
lower level
Add a hyphen
lower-level
show examples
animals
, the
lower level
Add a hyphen
lower-level
show examples
animals
and the producers will not extinct, because they reproduce more. Some people
rise
Correct your spelling
raise
show examples
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
animals
Fix the agreement mistake
animal rights
show examples
right
issues. Because every living
things
Change to a singular noun
thing
show examples
should
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
their lives.
By
Change preposition
From
show examples
this
perspective, human
beings
should not take benefit from
animals
unless they can make sure the
animals
do not suffer.
This
group
then
increase the number of vegetarians
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and initiate the practice of responsible farming and breeding. They believe by
implement
Change the verb form
implementing
show examples
this
, they can make the universe more sustainable. In conclusion, any
groups
Fix the agreement mistake
group
show examples
has
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
own justification. But I believe, human
beings
are part of the universe, and of
course
Add a comma
course,
show examples
part of
food
chains
as well, so that we may utilize other creatures but in
responsible
Change the article
a responsible
show examples
way to
make sure
Verb problem
ensure
show examples
the balance and
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
make sure no extinction in
this
world.
Submitted by ash_shoffat on

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task response
Your essay introduces both perspectives on the topic, which is good. However, ensure you address the prompt directly by clearly stating your stance (agree or disagree) in the introduction and conclusion.
task response
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Improve logical structure by organizing your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences that guide the reader. Ensure there is a smooth progression from one idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
Work on your transitions between ideas and paragraphs to enhance the overall flow and make your essay easier to read.
task response
You effectively consider both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced approach to the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, summarizing the main points of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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