the table shows the proportions of pupil attending four secondary school types

#proportions #pupil #four #school

The given table illustrates the data about the attendance of students in the four secondary

school

variants.

Overall

it is clear that

the only educational centre which had a noticeable increase is Voluntary- controlled academy,

whereas

the other three had only a decrease.

Firstly

, in 2000, the top-ranked

school

was Voluntary-controlled with 52%, in the meantime the lowest result was demonstrated by two schools:

Specialist

Correct article usage

a Specialist

show examples

and

Community

Correct article usage

a Community

show examples

school

which had an equal result of 12%.

Nevertheless

, in 2005, public schools had a significant rise,

while

Specialists went down slightly to 11%.

Secondly

, in 2005, the highest result was shown by Voluntary-controlled with 38%, meanwhile

Community

had 32%.

However

, in 2009,

Community

Correct article usage

the Community

show examples

school

overtook that

school

with a substantial improvement to 58%,

while

that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

academy had only 20% at that time.It is obvious that during the five

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

Voluntary-controlled

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

had

Change the article

the

show examples

best results,

nonetheless

in 2009,

Community

took that first place.

Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on Tue May 28 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words school, community with synonyms.

▼

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

151 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

proportion
secondary school
independent school
grammar school
specialist school
pupil enrollment
trend
regional variation
socio-economic status
educational outcomes
parental preference
academic achievement
government policy
funding
attendance rates

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the table shows the proportions of pupil attending four secondary school types

Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the positive and negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

Parents should be required to attend parenting courses every year to bring up their children well anbd give them a better environment for growth. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people think that strict punishments should be given to people over traffic accidents. Other think that other measures can help more to reduce the traffic accidents. discuss both views and give your opinion

In some countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that it is the responsibility of the government to solve the problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?