Some people believe that zoos have a positive impact on conservation efforts and education. Others argue that keeping animals in captivity is cruel and goes against their natural instincts. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Zoos
have being
part of human culture for a long time. Change the verb form
been
However
, its existance
currently Correct your spelling
existence
divide
opinions. Correct subject-verb agreement
divides
While
part of the public defend
that Correct subject-verb agreement
defends
zoos
are beneficial to conserve
and Wrong verb form
conserving
study
different fauna Wrong verb form
studying
especies
, others believe that keeping Correct your spelling
species
animals
confined and away from their natural ecosystem is an act of cruelty. In my opinion, animals
should leave
in their natural habitats rather than in captivity, so Correct your spelling
live
zoos
should be extinct.
One of the most common leisure activities in many cultures world-wide
is visiting Correct your spelling
worldwide
zoos
to learn about different animals
or for the sake of pure entreintement
. It is Correct your spelling
entertainment
also
a common school excursion for students to learn more about science as well as
different species and their biomas
. When visiting Correct your spelling
biomass
biomes
zoos
, for example
, children can observe wild animals
and some their
particular behaviours, consolidating theories learned in class throughout a lived experience. Change preposition
of their
Furthermore
, some of these establishments work on the conservation and rehabilitation of endangered creatures, which bring
a positive factor to Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
zoos
and brings people in their defense
.
Change the spelling
defence
On the other hand
, living in zoos
can be a
Change the article
an
extremelly
stressful experience for Correct your spelling
extremely
animals
simply because it is not their natural habitat. Species such
as lions and monkeys are naturals
from forests and are used to live in open territories. Fix the agreement mistake
natural
However
, they can be found in almost every zoo around the globe. Furthermore
, too many visitors and a limited jail space add extra layers of harm for
these innocent creatures. Change preposition
to
This
ends up being an act of cruelty against animals
. Thus
, Iin
my view, Correct your spelling
In
zoos
should be prohibeted
or Correct your spelling
prohibited
being
closed to the public, focusing only Unnecessary verb
apply
in
wildlife conservation, and recovery. Change preposition
on
Also
, students can learn by watching videos online, rather than visiting zoos
.
In conclusion, even tought
Correct your spelling
though
zoos
are an entreitaning
activity,Correct your spelling
entertaining
a
great opportunity for learning and conserving species, in my opinion, they should no longer exist or become Correct word choice
and a
a
animal conversation centre only. Change the article
an
This
is because it promotes animal cruelty when keeping creatures in jail or being observed for numerous passerbyes per day.Submitted by betinhaa00 on
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Grammar
Revise the essay for grammar and spelling mistakes, such as 'being' instead of 'been' and 'entertainment' instead of 'entreintement'. Improving the grammatical accuracy will enhance readability.
Development
Try to further develop the main points with more specific examples and stronger support. This will enhance the task achievement score. For example, specify particular conservation programs that zoos contribute to, or give data on the psychological effects of captivity on animals.
Structure
Improve the logical structure of the essay by making clearer transitions between points. Adding transitional phrases will help guide the reader through the argument more smoothly.
Structure
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the discussion well.
Balance
The author addresses both views on the issue, demonstrating a balanced approach before presenting their own opinion.
Understanding
The use of relevant points related to education and conservation shows a good understanding of the multiple functions of zoos.