Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree?

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In today's interconnected world, the advancement of
health
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,
education
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, and
trade
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is crucial for the progress of underprivileged
nations
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.
While
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local
governments
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in poorer
nations
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bear primary
responsibility
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for driving these improvements, I firmly believe that wealthier
nations
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have a moral obligation to extend substantial support in these areas.
Firstly
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, local
governments
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in poorer
nations
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are tasked with the
responsibility
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of spearheading initiatives aimed at improving healthcare systems, enhancing educational opportunities, and fostering
trade
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relations. These efforts are fundamental for sustainable
development
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and prosperity within these countries. By investing in healthcare infrastructure, expanding educational access, and promoting fair
trade
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practices, local
governments
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can lay the groundwork for long-term growth and stability.
However
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, the challenges faced by poorer
nations
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often exceed their capacity to address them adequately. Limited resources, insufficient expertise, and systemic barriers hinder their progress in achieving meaningful advancements in
health
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,
education
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, and
trade
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. In
such
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circumstances, the assistance of wealthier
nations
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becomes indispensable.
Governments
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of wealthier
nations
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possess the financial resources, technological expertise, and diplomatic influence needed to make a significant impact in addressing global disparities. By providing financial aid, sharing technological innovations, and fostering equitable
trade
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agreements, affluent
nations
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can facilitate the
development
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of essential infrastructure, improve educational outcomes, and stimulate economic growth in poorer countries.
Furthermore
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, addressing the root causes of poverty, inequality, and underdevelopment requires a collaborative effort on a global scale. Wealthier
nations
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, as beneficiaries of a globalized economy, have a vested interest in promoting stability, prosperity, and sustainable
development
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worldwide. Fulfilling their
responsibility
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to assist poorer
nations
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in
health
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,
education
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, and
trade
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not only embodies principles of global solidarity and compassion but
also
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contributes to fostering a more equitable and prosperous world for all. In conclusion,
while
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the primary
responsibility
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for the improvement of
health
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,
education
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, and
trade
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lies with the
governments
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of poorer
nations
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, wealthier
nations
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should actively support and collaborate with them in these critical areas. Through mutual cooperation, solidarity, and shared commitment to sustainable
development
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,
nations
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can work together to create a more inclusive, prosperous, and harmonious global community.
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea that directly supports your argument. Your essay has a strong structure, but make certain every paragraph ties back explicitly to your thesis.
Task Achievement
To fully complete the task, provide more concrete examples and data to support your arguments. You've made solid points, but incorporating case studies or statistical evidence could strengthen your position and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
Although your conclusion effectively summarises your argument, consider reiterating the significance of international cooperation in these development arenas. Emphasizing the broader implications of your conclusion could provide a more powerful closing statement.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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