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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Space exploration is too expensive and money should be spent on more important things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#space #exploration #money
In today's modern era, outer
space
exploration
 is familiar
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 most nations,
in contrast
, some criticize
this
 action
due to
 the fact that the authorities have to pay a fortune for
this
exploration
 which should be spent on other urgent
problems
 on
Earth
.
This
 author
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
 with the statement that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
enormous amounts of
money
 should
bespent
Correct your spelling
be spent
 on crucial things,
instead
 of being spent on cosmos
exploration
.
Firstly
,
space
explration
Correct your spelling
exploration
 may give humans the answers to solve various concerns on
Earth
 but it
also
 requires both time and
money
 since it has been still a tough challenge for scientists. What is more,
this
 activity
enquires
Verb problem
requires
show examples
 astronauts to have physical
strengh
Correct your spelling
strength
 and bravery as it is a risky adventure to explore another planet
beisde
Correct your spelling
beside
besides
Earth
 and they might have to face
weighless
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weightless
weigh less
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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 and even worse, death
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the cosmos.
For instance
,
Nasa
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NASA
show examples
 has to pay
a huge amounts
Correct the article-noun agreement
a huge amount
huge amounts
show examples
 of
money
 for
space
exploration
,
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 consists of producing
space ships
Correct your spelling
spaceships
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 and training astronauts
while
 America is facing various
problems
such
 as homelessness, inflation and downfall in
national
Add an article
the national
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 economy. It could be considered that
instead
 of trying to find ways to escape the polluted and endangered
Earth
, the government should pay more attention to the worldwide
problems
such
 as climate change or
farmine
Correct your spelling
famine
farming
. Human life is more essential than the alien at
distance
Correct article usage
a distance
show examples
 from us, the more
money
 spent on
helpng
Correct your spelling
helping
 and enhancing individuals' living standards, the more the
Earth
 will be improved. Charity is one of the activities that people can do to improve the world and make it better,
this
 is a good example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the agreements that were given.
Correct your spelling
In conclusion
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Inconclusion
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In conclusion
show examples
,
space
exploration
 might improve our living conditions on
Earth
, but
that is
also
 an unknown benefit, facing pressing
problems
 on
Earth
 is the clear and
see
Verb problem
apply
show examples
through
Correct your spelling
thorough
show examples
Correct your spelling
answer
answear
Correct your spelling
answer
 to improve human life as nations can give it a hand at
anytime
Correct your spelling
any time
show examples

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task achievement
The essay could benefit from more specific examples to support the main points. For instance, when discussing the costs of space exploration, it would be more convincing to provide data or specific figures.
task achievement
Try to elaborate more on each point. This will help in providing a comprehensive response to the task and will clearly convey all aspects of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure there are clear transitions between paragraphs to maintain a logical flow. This will improve the readability of your essay and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar. While minor mistakes won't majorly impact your score, consistently correct grammatical errors will make your ideas clearer and more professional.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction sets a clear context for the discussion and presents the thesis statement effectively. This helps the reader understand the writer's viewpoint right from the beginning.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay, reinforcing the writer's stance on the topic.
supported main points
The writer attempts to address both the positive and negative aspects of space exploration, which shows an effort to present a balanced argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • exorbitant
  • myriad
  • pressing issues
  • allocated
  • advances
  • direct results
  • pave the way
  • uninhabitable
  • inspirational aspects
  • fuels innovation
  • shared goal
  • intellectual capital
  • budget overruns
  • tangible benefits
  • rationale
  • dedicating
  • returns on investment
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