Today, the majority of children are raised by their grandparents due to the fact that their parents are busy working. To what extend do you think it effects the while family?

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Most
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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people are taking care of their grandchildren,
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

fathers and mothers are working and
had
Wrong verb form
have

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb had. Consider changing it.

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hectic
scadule
Correct your spelling
schedule

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. in my point of
view
Add a comma
view,

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it has a lot of
both
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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disadvatages
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disadvantages

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and advantages,
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Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase However. Consider adding a comma.

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the cons are more than
pros
Correct article usage
the pros

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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. The impact of
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

action could
interfer
Correct your spelling
interfere

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in
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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many life aspects,
Additionally
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can
effect
Correct your spelling
affect

The word effect doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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the community as well.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
childern
Correct your spelling
children

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who tend to grow
with
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up with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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their grandparents tend to
by
Correct your spelling
be

The word by doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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psycologically
Correct your spelling
psychologically

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unstable,
because
Add the preposition
because of

It appears that there is a missing preposition after the word because. Consider adding a preposition.

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the lack of family
boundraie
Correct your spelling
boundaries

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. Raising
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and
teengs
Correct your spelling
teens
teenagers

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is
very
Add an article
a very

The noun phrase very complex process seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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complex process and
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs

It seems that the verb need does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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larg
Correct your spelling
large

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effort and attention,
As well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

its
Correct your spelling
is

The word its doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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imporant
Correct your spelling
important

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to
guid
Correct your spelling
guide

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the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in their pathways. In fact, there
is
Change the verb form
are

The verb is does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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some positive points
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will learn to be more self
dependens
Correct your spelling
dependent
dependents

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,
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, one of my
freinds
Correct your spelling
friends

If you don’t want freinds to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

grow
Wrong verb form
grew

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb grow. Consider changing it.

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in
Change preposition
up in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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her
grands
Correct your spelling
grand

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house,
she
Correct word choice
and she

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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had
strong
Correct article usage
a strong

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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personatlity
Correct your spelling
personality

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.
Although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

she says that she
experinced
Correct your spelling
experienced

If you don’t want experinced to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

harm
Replace the word
harmful

The word harm doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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Change preposition
in cildhood
show examples
Change preposition
in cildhood

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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cildhood
Correct your spelling
childhood
.
Finally
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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totally
argue
Verb problem
agree

There may be a verb use issue here.

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to leave my babies with my parent under any conditions. To
coclude
Correct your spelling
conclude

If you don’t want coclude to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

, the negative consequences
not
Add a missing verb
are not

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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only limited to
childen
Correct your spelling
children

If you don’t want childen to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

but the family as
whole
Add an article
a whole

The noun phrase whole seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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can be affected. So
i
Change the capitalization
I

The pronoun I should always be capitalized.

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think we all should value our time to spend
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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with
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

always try to be present for their needs.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay would benefit from a clearer structure. Begin with an introduction that outlines the topic and your main points, then proceed to elaborating on each point in separate paragraphs. Finally, conclude by summarizing your main arguments. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay.
task achievement
Make sure to support each of your main points with concrete examples and detailed explanations. This helps in building a more compelling argument and demonstrates your ability to provide comprehensive responses.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. For example, 'scadule' should be 'schedule' and 'psylogically' should be 'psychologically'. Attention to detail in language use can significantly improve the readability and overall impression of your essay.
task achievement
You've made a solid attempt to address both the advantages and disadvantages of children being raised by their grandparents. This shows a balanced approach to the topic.
task achievement
Your example about your friend adds a personal touch and helps to make your point about the potential benefits of being raised by grandparents.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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