In the past, knowledge was stored in books. Today, people stored knowledge on the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
In the previous decade,
people
captured knowledge
in books
. However
, in today's digital age, most individuals believe that knowledge
is contained on the social networking site. It is the writer who strongly supports that the benefits of a variety of valuable knowledge
and constant access to information
on the internet
far outweigh the drawbacks of illegal and misleading information
.
One of the main beneficial aspects of storing knowledge
on social networks instead
of storing it in books
. There is no doubt that the internet
brings more conveniences for people
to capture knowledge
in all fields
. Moreover
, people
can contain more in-depth or professional data
throughout the social networking site. There is no limitation about information
in all areas of our life
on the internet
and people
update the newest information
on the internet
immediately instead
of waiting for the publication of new books
. For instance
, relying on a public survey of a specific American university, a large percentage of students chose to capture new knowledge
for their assignments and knowledge
stored in books
was chosen by a few numbers of students. Because they believe that the internet
brings more valuable and useful information
for them in any circumstances.
Another significant advantage of containing data
on the social networking site is saving significant time
for all people
, regardless of age and sex. It is a transport to approach immediately information
everywhere and every time
. People
can easily and quickly access more fields
in their lives. They also
spend less time
acquiring knowledge
on the internet
, whereas
books
take a massive amount of time
to be read before storing some necessary knowledge
. Hence
, people
prefer to utilize modern technology to constantly approach their data
anywhere and anytime. There is clear evidence that people
of all ages presently use the internet
to update the latest news and capture more data
in this
day and age far more than reading books
for a long time
to contain information
in many specific areas.
The main drawback associated with knowledge
being stored on the internet
in this
hustle and bustle of life
is the illegal and misinformation data
. In the present day, some people
are interested in posting without any verification so a lot of misleading information
is expanded quickly in public. For
this
reason, their community declines the social levels and supports the bad behaviours. Furthermore
, this
action has some negative impact on health-related and law-related fields
in each person's life
. Take the Vietnamese community as a specific example for this
statement, a lot of teenagers lean towards a trend which shares and expresses their emotions about particular problems but they do not exactly know the realistic levels. Moreover
, there are more and more illegal information
is spread by Vietnamese without verification by anyone. Thus
, this
activity may bring more terrible consequences for each life
and society.
Considering all of these factors, strong knowledge
of social networking sites is a key method to gain more valuable and useful knowledge
and immediately approach their needed data
in all fields
still outweighed by the wrong information
. Hence
, the Internet
is far more beneficial for our developing life
than books
in any way.Submitted by [email protected] on
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task achievement
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines the main points to be discussed in the essay. The current introduction mentions advantages and disadvantages but could be clearer in setting up what will be covered.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the flow of the essay. Use linking words and phrases to ensure ideas are connected smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Review and refine grammar and sentence structures to avoid repetitive or awkward phrasing. This will help in delivering your ideas more effectively and clearly.
task achievement
You have addressed both the advantages and disadvantages of storing knowledge on the internet effectively, showing a balanced view.
task achievement
Specific examples, such as the public survey from an American university and the situation in Vietnam, help in supporting your arguments and add credibility to your points.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion structure, which provides a logical framework for your arguments.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example