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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the average cost of monthly contract for four different mobile (cell phones) in a European country from January to September 2002, measured in euro.

The chart below shows the average cost of monthly contract for four different mobile (cell phones) in a European country from January to September 2002, measured in euro.
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The line graph demonstrates the number of money contracts in four varied cell phones after 9 months since January in a country in Europe. In general,
Domo
Use synonyms
, Lex and Alpha increased the value in research substantially
whereas
Linking Words
 Sim TX decreased slightly.
Moreover
Linking Words
, Alpha had the lowest price at first
then
Linking Words
 significantly increased to the highest rate
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. Looking at the figures in
further
Linking Words
 detail,
it is clear that
Linking Words
Domo
Use synonyms
's expenses went up to approximately 23 euros from 1
euro
Use synonyms
 in January to September.
Similarly
Linking Words
, there was a rise to just over 15
euro
Use synonyms
 in September after starting at 13
euro
Use synonyms
 in January. Turning to
Domo
Use synonyms
 and Sim TX, the disparities were big
at the end
Linking Words
 of the timetable. Regarding
Domo
Use synonyms
, which had the lowest expense before significantly reaching the peak at 25 euros from Jun to September.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Sim TX slowly rose up to 15 euros in Jun before dropping to the lowest cost
at the end
Linking Words
 just under 10
Use synonyms
euro
Fix the agreement mistake
euros
show examples
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words domo, euro with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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