some people think that students should take gap year to what extent do you agree?

#people #students #gap #year

The debate on whether

students

should take a

year

off after completing school is ongoing.

While

I acknowledge that a

gap

year

offers substantial advantages for

students

, I contend that it

also

poses potential risks to their academic success. In

this

essay, I will elaborate on both the merits and drawbacks associated with taking

this

time off. One prominent advantage of taking a

year

off is that it allows

students

to enrich their understanding of the world.

For instance

, travelling enables them to experience diverse cultures and sample regional cuisines.

For example

, young people may travel to Turkey, where they can witness cultural diversity firsthand and enjoy local dishes.

This

exposure broadens their perspectives.

Furthermore

, a

gap

year

can allow

students

to gain practical work experience. By working as office clerks,

for example

, they can develop not only professional experience but

also

critical skills like time management, which ultimately enhances their competitiveness in the job market.

However

, it is essential to consider that a

gap

year

may negatively impact

students

' subsequent academic progress.

This

is because the enjoyment derived from travel can diminish their motivation to continue studying.

Additionally

, if they secure a well-paying job during

this

period, they may question the value of higher education and opt to bypass university altogether, viewing it as unnecessary.

Consequently

, young people may embark on their careers prematurely, foregoing their academic pursuits. In conclusion,

while

taking a

gap

year

can be a valuable component of one’s educational journey, I strongly believe that it should be approached with careful planning.

Otherwise

students

may encounter significant challenges in their academic trajectories.

Submitted by pandatvin3 on Wed Oct 30 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that all main points are evenly supported with examples and explanations. The examples provided in the essay are good but could be slightly more varied or detailed to cover more facets, such as the possible academic risks of a gap year.

coherence cohesion

While the essay is logically structured, refining some connections between points can enhance cohesion further. It might help to explicitly tie the points in the second body paragraph back to the thesis in the introduction.

task achievement

The essay offers a clear and comprehensive response to the task with a balanced discussion of both the pros and cons of a gap year.

coherence cohesion

Logical structure is maintained throughout the essay, with clear paragraphs dedicated to each main point.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are effectively present, delimiting the arguments from start to finish.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some people think that students should take gap year to what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Now a days, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Some people believe school children should be given multiple short vacations, while others believe they should get one long vacation. Give the advantages of both and express your own point of view.

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage students . Do you think its advantages outweigh its disadvantages?