Some people think everyone should be a vegtarian , becouse we do not need to eat meat to stay helthy . To waht extent do you agree or disagree

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In the world have a
lot
of
vegitarian
Correct your spelling
vegetarian
individuals
Correct word choice
and then
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then
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than
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unvegtarian
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vegetarian
humans ,so that type of
people
Add the comma(s)
, as well as dietolges and doctors,
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as well as
dietolges and doctors said ,when
people
ear
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eat
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healthy
food
may be
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maybe
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they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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live
Replace the word
life
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in
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apply
show examples
longer
then
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than
show examples
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
eat
Correct pronoun usage
who eat
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a
lot
of
meal
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meals
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. When
people
eat a
lot
Add the preposition
lot of
show examples
meat
it leads to weight gain and obesity
then
affects the circulatory system and
worst
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the worst
show examples
case it causes a person to have a short life span Depending on
method
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the method
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of cooking
meat
or
beff
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beef
products whether it is . If all
type
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types
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of
food
boiled
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are boiled
show examples
or steamed of course it is useful for
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a person
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person
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person's
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body .
On the other
hand
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hand,
show examples
it is definitely a loss
that is
fried and cooked in a
diffrent
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different
way. On the other
side
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side,
show examples
population need to
helathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
food
.
Moreover
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Moreover,
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kindi
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kinds
kind
of
people
crazy
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are crazy
show examples
about
of
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apply
show examples
meat
and fast
food
so
jung
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junk
food
80
percent
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per cent
show examples
of it is made from
meat
also
it is not
helath
Correct your spelling
health
healthy
food
. If
people
would like
helathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
food
they eat more and more fruit or
vegetabels
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vegetables
vegetable
. Nowadays many
people
eat a
lot
meat
Change preposition
of meat
show examples
Correct your spelling
because
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
meat
is very yummy and tasty
food
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
Your essay touches on relevant arguments for both vegetarianism and meat-eating, which is good. However, make sure your main points are fully developed and supported by specific examples or evidence. This will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay more effectively by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main point and contributes to your overall argument. This will help in maintaining a logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Try to make a clear introduction that outlines your position and a conclusion that summarizes your key points. This will create a more cohesive essay.
coherence cohesion
Work on your grammar, spelling, and sentence structure to improve clarity. This will make your ideas easier to understand and follow.
task achievement
While you made some good points, be sure to focus on making them clearer and more comprehensive. Avoid repetitive statements and aim for depth in your analysis.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt and have provided reasons for both supporting and opposing vegetarianism. This shows a balanced consideration of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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