Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative

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The mitigation of

crime

rates is becoming a controversial issue, considering its sudden surge worldwide. Numerous people believe that long-term imprisonment is a wise way to tackle

crime

Whereas

, others Advocate that there are many more alternative ways to handle

crime

than longer

prison

sentences

Change the punctuation

show examples

This

essay will discuss both perspectives, before offering a conclusion.

However

, I am in solidarity with the latter view. A section of society thinks that long-term

prison

gives prisoners quality time to think about the wrongdoings that they have committed during their lives.

This

may provide a feeling of self-realization, and it can be seen that the time spent with herself often leads to positive outcomes.

Moreover

this

segregation from social life poses fear to those who commit crimes. Needless to say, if a person is fully aware of the

punishment

, especially a longer

prison

then

he thinks twice before performing any

crime

For example

, in Norway, the high authorities give long-term

punishment

to prisoners in jail and provide all the facilities to them.

Hence

, the

crime

rate in the same country is 4% which is remarkably low as compared to other countries.

In contrast

, certain individuals opine that there are countless better ways available, that might be more effective than a longer jail sentence. They state that

need

Verb problem

apply

show examples

punishment

should be based on the

crime

In other words

, assigning life imprisonment to serial killers might not be a prudent approach, as they can build their

friendship

Fix the agreement mistake

friendships

show examples

with other offenders inside, and

also

it seems Injustice for the victims.

In addition

, death

punishment

is cost-saving to the government as

they

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

not only eliminates serious offenders from society but

also

maintains the discipline of prisons.

According to

me, the punishments should be decided after taking the cruelty into account. For minor crimes, short-term imprisonment might be effective, and for psychopaths and murderers, capital

punishment

is the better way to reduce

crime

. In conclusion, there is no denying

this

conviction that

crime

is rising at an alarming rate and reducing

such

crime

is a daunting task for the government.

However

, other ways

such

as death sentences may generate fear among criminals and can reduce

crime

Add an article

a great

show examples

great

Correct word choice

greater

show examples

extent than longer

prison

sentences.

Submitted by rajwants.1997 on Thu May 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure grammatical accuracy to enhance clarity and readability. For example, 'in solidarity with the latter view' can be better phrased as 'in agreement with the latter view.'

coherence cohesion

Use transitional words and phrases more effectively to enhance the flow of the essay. This will help in guiding the reader through your arguments seamlessly.

task achievement

Expand on specific examples to strengthen arguments and provide more convincing support for your viewpoints.

introduction conclusion present

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a comprehensive response to the prompt.

complete response

The writer has attempted to address both perspectives fairly and provided a clear opinion, aligning with the requirements of the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

365 words

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