Many people use social media every day to get in touch with other people and be aware of news events. Do you think the advantages of this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Some
people
assert that using the
Internet
every day to communicate with other
people
and
informative
Replace the word
inform them
show examples
of news.
However
, it is obvious that
ceslessly
Correct your spelling
ceaselessly
contact, a disadvantage, outweighs, the full of
informaion
Correct your spelling
information
, an advantage
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
whether is good to use
internet
-based communication every day. In modern society where the
Internet
keep
Verb problem
apply
show examples
has been developed more and more than ever before,
people
easily
contect
Correct your spelling
connect
contact
with each other and browse the data with no limit of time and space.
Therefore
, a number of
people
work
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad or a personal home, making more productivity and increasing employees' job satisfaction.
Also
, since the various
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
about
people
, art, cultures and documents can easily
find
Wrong verb form
be found on
show examples
the
Internet
,
people
become more
creativity
Replace the word
creative
show examples
by watching others'
defferent
Correct your spelling
different
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
show examples
.
On the other hand
, the full of information
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Internet
has negative impacts on
people
's quality of life.
This
is because
people
should pay attention to their social networks even after
finish
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finishing
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work.
This
needlessly
contect
Correct your spelling
contact
connect
content
with others through the phone leaves us to feel with
feeling
Add an article
a feeling
the feeling
show examples
of tired and
exhusted
Correct your spelling
exhausted
.
For example
, these days,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
of campaigns suggest
to get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
out of the
Internet
world and
to live
Change the verb form
living
show examples
real
Add an article
a real
the real
show examples
life. In conclusion,
due to
the facts that the
Internet
give a lot of convenience in life,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it is necessary to how much we
are depending
Wrong verb form
depend
show examples
on the online.
However
, ceaseless information indubitable indicates
such
a theme.
Submitted by kopopig on

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task achievement
Your introduction sets up the topic, but it could be clearer. Ensure that your thesis statement clearly states your opinion regarding whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Your essay needs well-developed paragraphs. Each paragraph should contain one main idea supported by details and examples.
coherence cohesion
Use connectors such as 'Firstly,' 'Additionally,' 'Moreover,' etc., to guide the reader through your arguments.
task achievement
Improve your spelling and grammar to avoid errors such as 'contect' which should be 'contact', and 'defferent' which should be 'different'.
task achievement
The conclusion should summarize your main points clearly and restate your thesis in a way that reinforces your argument.
task achievement
You attempted to address both the advantages and disadvantages of using social media. This demonstrates an understanding of the task requirements.
task achievement
You showed awareness of how the Internet impacts social interaction and convenience in modern life. This reflects a good grasp of the essay's topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster connections
  • geographical barriers
  • disseminating
  • credible sources
  • misinformation
  • mental health
  • social comparison
  • cyberbullying
  • leverage
  • digital marketplace
  • political activism
  • social justice
  • widespread mobilization
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