IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

You are invited to a party, however, because of some reasons you didn’t attend. Write a letter to the friend who invites you: (1) explain the reason why you didn’t go; (2) express your apology; (3) ask about some details in the party.

#party #didn’t #friend #reason #apology
Dear Ihsan, I am writing
this
 letter to tell you some reasons why I cannot attend a
party
. Let me explain it
To begin
 with, during the
last
 weeks I stayed at the Hospital to look after my mother who getting sick.
Therefore
, I cannot leave her as her children.
In addition
, only
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 who protect her until she gets well.
Therefore
, I am
teribble
Correct your spelling
terrible
terribly
 sorry for
this
 situation and I promise to attend the
party
 next time. I felt uncomfortable about what happened.
This
 is the first time I wasn't able to participate in the
party
 I would like to ask about several of the activities at the
party
 that's I suppose it has to be an incredible
party
 with many of our friends who enjoy the
party
due to
that is
 your
party
 which is rarely held again Thank you so much, I am looking forward to hearing you soon Regards Levi
Submitted by patricius.yohanes on

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coherence cohesion
Clarify some sentences for better understanding. For example, "only i who protect her" could be written as "I am the only one who can take care of her."
task achievement
Ensure all parts of the task are fully developed. You have briefly mentioned the reason, apology, and inquiry about the party details, but more elaboration can improve the completeness.
task achievement
The letter maintains a friendly and apologetic tone, which is appropriate for the context.
coherence cohesion
The letter follows a logical structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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