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Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagram below shows a neighborhood before and after a mall was constructed. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows a neighborhood before and after a mall was constructed. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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he
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The
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 pictures illustrate the changes, which have taken place in a neighbourhood before and after building a shopping
mall
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, a parking
lot
Use synonyms
 was built in the area replacing two houses,
while
Linking Words
 a book
store
Use synonyms
 and shoe
store
Use synonyms
 were removed for the shopping
mall
Use synonyms
. Park and Lake were torn down to empty
a
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space for another parking
lot
Use synonyms
. The new shopping
mall
Use synonyms
 has been built by removing the book
store
Use synonyms
 and shoe
store
Use synonyms
,
besides
Linking Words
 that the forest to the north has been torn down to allocate more space to the new
mall
Use synonyms
. Before building the
mall
Use synonyms
, there was a housing area along Main
Street
Use synonyms
 and Oak
Street
Use synonyms
. Two of the houses
in
Change preposition
on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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Main
Street
Use synonyms
 were demolished to construct a parking
lot
Use synonyms
 to the north.
However
Linking Words
, houses on
the
Correct article usage
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Oak
Use synonyms
street
Capitalize word
Street
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 remained the same.
In addition
Linking Words
, another parking
lot
Use synonyms
 was built to replace the park and the lake, which were
at
Change preposition
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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far south of the
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
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.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words mall, lot, store, street with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Traffic flow
  • Land use
  • Residential buildings
  • Commercial activities
  • Local businesses
  • Retail stores
  • Local economy
  • Employment
  • Community facilities
  • Displaced
  • Construction
  • Green spaces
  • Pollution
  • Noise
  • Environmental impact
  • Neighborhood dynamics
  • Transformation
  • Redevelopment
  • Infrastructure
  • Urbanization
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