Government should focus their spending on public services rather than on arts such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It's important to think about how the
government
spends its money. Some people think they should spend it on public Use synonyms
services
. Others may argue that they should spend on Use synonyms
art
. In my personal opinion, I think Use synonyms
art
is essential for humans as a public service.
Use synonyms
First,
the arts are as important to life as are other Linking Words
services
provided by the Use synonyms
government
. Use synonyms
This
is because different Linking Words
art
forms and styles Use synonyms
such
as music, which help ease the stress of painting, are Linking Words
colorful
allowing us to immerse ourselves in the Change the spelling
colourful
colorful
world of the painting itself. Change the spelling
colourful
Furthermore
, a good work of Linking Words
art
is a sign of the level of civilization and creativity. the people of the Use synonyms
country
. It can be said that it reflects the nature of the Use synonyms
country
.
If a Use synonyms
country
does not have Use synonyms
art
, it shows that its people are not creative and lack Use synonyms
basic
instincts of human nature. Correct article usage
the basic
On the other hand
, no one can deny the importance of public Linking Words
services
. The Use synonyms
government
must allocate part of its funding to public Use synonyms
services
Use synonyms
such
as strengthening basic education, the health care system and the Linking Words
country
's infrastructure. Use synonyms
country
. But if all spending goes to public Use synonyms
services
, it will cause an imbalance in the Use synonyms
country
's structure, and taxpayers will be angry because old tax money is only spent in one way.
In conclusion, it can be reiterated that the Use synonyms
government
is responsible for allocating part of the money to public Use synonyms
services
, Use synonyms
while
the rest must go to creative fields Linking Words
such
as the arts. Linking Words
This
is intended to create a more balanced society.Linking Words
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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task prompt by discussing the importance of art as a public service. However, to strengthen your response, it would be beneficial to provide clearer and more comprehensive ideas. For instance, provide specific examples or case studies that illustrate the importance of art in society or how government funding for the arts has positively impacted communities.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea that is fully developed. Your second paragraph starts strong but can be clearer on the distinctions between the different points. Additionally, link your points more effectively to avoid any confusion or repetition.
structure
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay nicely.
content
You successfully highlight the importance of both arts and public services, showing that you understand the complexity of the issue.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite