Everywhere we go, we are surrounded by advertisements. Some people think that advertisements can affect our thinking and that it can have a negative influence on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#advertisements #people #influence #lives

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In these

Change preposition

These

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days,

advertisements

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are common

things

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that we see

everyday

Replace the word

every day

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However

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

believe that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

advertisements

Use synonyms

have

downside

Add an article

a downside

show examples

in our lives and

also

Linking Words

can influence our thinking. Despite

Change preposition

apply

show examples

that, I think the effects of

advertisements

Use synonyms

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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depend on the individual,

while

Linking Words

the

advertisements

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are

Change the verb form

also have

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also

Linking Words

have

a benefits

Correct the article-noun agreement

benefits

a benefit

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another sector

Fix the agreement mistake

other sectors

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Use synonyms

people

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people's

show examples

live

Replace the word

lives

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. Here

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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is my explanation.

Firstly

Linking Words

, in order to affect

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people

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people's

show examples

mind

Correct subject-verb agreement

minds

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, I think

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

advertisements

Use synonyms

only

effects

Verb problem

affect

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the choice of certain

things

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Change preposition

show examples

what

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we have

payed

Correct your spelling

paid

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attention

with

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show examples

. So, I think, it only influences our choice not related to our way of thinking.

Secondly

Linking Words

, sometimes the

advertisements

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delivers

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deliver

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in creative ways, where it needs to be unique to get the

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people

Change noun form

people's

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attention.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

can add information or references for

people

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according

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apply

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in order to create something.

Thirdly

Linking Words

, the

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is a part of the business which is it can increase the opportunity in terms of selling

things

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. With the increasing of income in the business it can lead the business to expand which can open more jobs. So, the

Use synonyms

Verb problem

apply

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also

Linking Words

having

Wrong verb form

has

show examples

a positive side related to

help

Wrong verb form

helping

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the economy. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

there are some claims

Correct word choice

that

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the

Use synonyms

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

affect

Replace the word

effect

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in ways

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

thinking

Wrong verb form

think

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and

lives

Correct subject-verb agreement

live

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, actually

it doesn't

Wrong verb form

don't

show examples

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

thinking skills and

also

Linking Words

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

have good benefits

too

Rephrase

apply

show examples

. The

Use synonyms

only

influence

Change the verb form

influences

show examples

the

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

choice of certain

things

Use synonyms

and

also

Linking Words

sometimes the idea in the

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can be references to do

another

Replace the adjective

another thing

other things

show examples

things

Use synonyms

and it

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

benefits in increasing the economy.

Submitted by rlsatria on Fri May 31 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic and expresses a clear position. However, you could strengthen your arguments by providing more specific examples and evidence to support your points.

coherence cohesion

There are a few grammatical and syntactical errors that slightly affect clarity and coherence. Working on your grammar and sentence structures will improve the overall quality of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Try to enhance the logical flow between your paragraphs. Using more transitional phrases can help make the progression of your ideas smoother.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a good structure to your response.

task achievement

You have made a commendable effort to explain your points and discuss both sides of the argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
41
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

260 words

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Everywhere we go, we are surrounded by advertisements. Some people think that advertisements can affect our thinking and that it can have a negative influence on our lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

With the development of technology, children are now living in a world that is different to what it was 50 years ago. What problems does this situation cause for society and family ?

Some people believe that tourists benefit from tourism, while others believe that such countries are negatively affected. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Both government investment in public transport systems and reductions in public transport ticket prices would help to reduce transport pollution greatly. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Nowadays, many people choose to be self-employed rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might be the case? What could be the disadvantages of self-employment?

Human activities have negative effects on the environment. Some people believe it is too late to take measures to prevent animals and plants from dying out. Others think actions should be taken to improve the situation. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.