IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The climograph below shows average monthly temperatures and rainfall in the city of Kolkata.

#climograph #temperatures #rainfall #city #kolkata
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The bar chart and line graph compare the 12 months in terms of average temperature and
rainfall
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 in Kolkata city.
Overall
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, the indicator of the temperature fluctuated steadily in the given period, the higher
rainfall
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 was experienced in June and the lowest one was in December. In January, the average temperature was at 20
°C
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.
Then
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, it increased gradually to 30
°C
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 in April. Until October, it had a considerable decrease to approximately 27
°C
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.
Then
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, the indicator declined sharply to 20
°C
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 in December. Regarding average
rainfall
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, it was at about 15
mm
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 in January. The indicators of February, March and April were relatively similar, at 20
mm
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 for February, 35
mm
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 for March and 50
mm
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 for April. The figure for May was the same as those for October, at 150
mm
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. The figure for June was quite higher than that, at 260
mm
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. The highest
rainfall
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 rates were experienced in July, August and September, at nearly 340
mm
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 for July, 330
mm
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 for August and about 300
mm
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 for September. The indicator of November was at 20
mm
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. The lowest
rainfall
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 rate was experienced in December, at approximately 10
mm
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.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
The introduction provides a good summary of the type of data being represented, but could be made clearer by specifying that temperatures and rainfall are presented on different axes.
coherence and cohesion
The essay would benefit from a clearer conclusion that summarizes the main findings.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single point or aspect of the graph for better clarity and cohesion.
task achievement
Avoid redundancy in describing similar data points. For example, instead of stating figures for each month individually, you could group similar trends together to make your description more concise.
task achievement
The essay includes a clear introduction that outlines the subject of the climograph.
task achievement
Specific data points are supported by numerical values, providing clear evidence from the graph.
coherence and cohesion
Clear logical structure in the body paragraphs, making it easy to follow the progression of ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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