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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people feel that boarding schools (where students or pupils live at the school during the term) are an excellent option for children, while other people disagree for a number of reasons. Consider both sides of this debate and reach a conclusion.

#people #schools #students #pupils #school #term #option #children #debate #conclusion
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Choosing the right
school
 for children has always been
parents'
Correct article usage
the parents'
show examples
 concern. It is often believed that youngsters might benefit from attending boarding
schools
. The issue,
however
, is not entirely straightforward, and arguments can
also
 be made against the idea.
This
 essay will discuss the debate, and give a concluding view. On the one hand, opponents of
this
 view cite that studying in
this
 kind of
school
 may result in spending less time with families.
This
,
consequently
, could bring about distance between family members causing weaker relationship bonds. A good case in point is my colleague's son who has attended a boarding
school
 for almost two years, his father is always complaining about not spending enough time with his son, and he has lost the chance to establish an appropriate father-son relationship.
By contrast
, those who support boarding
schools
 point out the various benefits that these places can bring to children. These range from socializing with their peers to studying better and having daily routines which could contribute to a healthier life. An example to illustrate
this
 is my colleague's son who used to be shy but after attending boarding
schools
, he has managed to fit in between his classmates and get higher grades.
Moreover
,
due to
school
 rules, they have to eat, study, exercise, and sleep at specific times which has made them attain a healthy lifestyle.
Overall
, it is logical
to conclude
 that attending
such
schools
 is prolific for youngsters in terms of socialization, education and fostering healthy habits if parents are ready to deal with their loved ones' absence during a semester.
Submitted by h.safaralizade on

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task achievement
The essay provides a well-rounded discussion of both sides of the argument, but it could delve a bit deeper into the drawbacks of boarding schools. Expanding on the negative aspects or providing additional examples could strengthen the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Ensure varied sentence structures to keep the reader engaged. Mixing simple, compound, and complex sentences can help in this regard.
introduction conclusion present
The essay has a clear and concise introduction that sets the stage for the discussion. It also has a well-structured conclusion that summarizes the main points effectively.
logical structure
Logical structure is strong, with each paragraph dedicated to a specific point of view, followed by supporting examples. This makes the essay easy to follow.
supported main points
The use of specific, real-life examples to support the arguments adds credibility and relevance to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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