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Writing Samples
Band 8

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

#year #school #university
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Nowadays, taking a gap year before college is well-liked among students who have just finished high school.
While
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 there are some benefits associated with taking a break after school, I believe the main drawbacks are more substantial. On the one hand, a potential advantage of a one-year sabbatical may be the students would have more time to discover their passions and interests. They would have a chance to examine their desires and that leads to choosing the right field to study at university. To graduate from a desirable course might help the individuals to remember that period of their lives as a fine experience. Another perceived benefit is that by having more free time they can obtain a temporary job which can result in reaching financial independence and that extra money can
also
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 be a proper backing for college expenditures.
On the other hand
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, a primary disadvantage of
this
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 issue is that it keeps teenagers away from the educational environment which causes discouragement in students to achieve higher educational accomplishments. A
further
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 negative is that it can affect their resume adversely since some employers don’t appreciate seeing gaps on a CV.
Therefore
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, some of the employment positions that they actually might deserve will be risked by taking a gap after schooling. On balance, it is true that taking a year off would seem advantageous under certain circumstances.
However
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, in my view, its negative effects in terms of lack of enthusiasm for pursuing tertiary education and threatening professional opportunities override the advantages.
Submitted by amirahmadi9301 on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your essay and make your points more compelling.
task achievement
Consider elaborating more on the advantages and disadvantages. Provide more depth in your arguments to fully develop your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and the ideas flow logically from one to the other. This will help improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Linking phrases and transitional words will help to show the relationship between ideas and paragraphs more clearly. This could enhance the logical structure of your arguments.
task achievement
The essay covers both advantages and disadvantages clearly, fulfilling the task requirements well.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both present and effectively positioned, providing a satisfying structure to the essay.
coherence cohesion
The main points are well supported overall, making the essay clear and easy to follow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • work experience
  • internships
  • traveling
  • life experiences
  • personal development
  • independent
  • self-reliant
  • educational progress
  • graduation timeline
  • financial burden
  • academic momentum
  • structured academic environment
What to do next:
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