Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of the people and there is little that can be done to rectify this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In today’s modern society, social media has become a double-edged sword as it brings both upsides and downsides. Many people assume that internet users are being controlled in terms of perspectives and it is challenging for everyone to resolve

this

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issue. From my viewpoint, I partly agree with

this

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idea. On the one side,

this

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assumption is true because social media monitors take advantage of crowd psychology to manipulate the residents.

For example

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, about 2 years ago, the new girlfriend of the most famous Vietnamese singer at that time was criticized as the other woman between that singer and his previous partner by netizens despite her refutation.

Due to

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this

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incident, her career went down significantly afterwards. What is more, many hot current affairs have

also

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been hidden because of unknown reasons. To be more specific, there has been no trace of the wars between Israel and Palestine on Facebook so many people were clueless about the current news including the damage to humans and property.

Thus

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, it can be seen that the cyber community is being led by the nose.

On the other hand

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, the society is becoming more and more developed.

In other words

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, public awareness about cyberworld has been raised remarkably so they can evaluate online events.

For instance

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, a recent case recently about a pupil being in isolation in his class posted by his mom has concerned a lot of people. After a short period of time, netizens found out that what the mom told them was totally untrue.

Due to

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her selfishness, she made up a story to protect herself.

Additionally

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, residents now defend their rights in many ways. Another example is about recent event when there was proof proving that one famous family in Viet Nam joined the rebel force.

Instead

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of protecting their idols, netizens protested

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family by posting inspirational videos to spread the word about patriotism.

Therefore

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, there are many solutions to

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raised matter. In conclusion,

while

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many threads are being posed when using the internet, web surfers appear to overcome

this

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issue.

Thus

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, it is essential to raise the users’ awareness about cyber risks in modern life.

bichngoc.ngochoaSat Jun 01 2024

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task achievement

Try to enhance the precision of your examples to make them more relevant to the argument you are presenting. For instance, mentioning specific types of social media manipulation methods (e.g., fake news, echo chambers) could strengthen your argument significantly.

coherence cohesion

To make your ideas clearer, try to avoid repetition and ensure each point is explicitly linked back to the main argument. This will make your essay more cohesive and easier to follow.

coherence cohesion

Consider refining some of your expressions and correcting minor grammatical errors to improve clarity and coherence. For example, revising sentences like 'many threads are being posed' to 'many threats are posed' will enhance readability.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction clearly states your position and sets the stage for your arguments. It provides a good foundation for the rest of the essay.

introduction conclusion present

The conclusion effectively summarizes your points and reiterates the importance of awareness about cyber risks, providing a coherent end to your essay.

logical structure

Your essay is well-organized with clear paragraphing and transitions. Each paragraph effectively addresses a specific aspect of the question, maintaining logical progression throughout.

supported main points

You provide relevant examples to support your arguments, such as the story about the Vietnamese singer and the event involving the famous family in Vietnam, which make your points more tangible and relatable.

12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

358 words

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Whoever controls the media also controls opinions and attitudes of the people and there is little that can be done to rectify this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People always believe that we could be a better person by using positive mindset. To what extend do you agree?

The illustration show how chocolate is produced.

In recent years, the family structure has changed, as well as family roles. What are the changes occurring? Do you think these changes are positive or negative? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people think that the inteernet has brought people closer togethert while others that people and communities are bbecome more isolated. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Others think they should begin after 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.