IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people find it difficult to speak in front of and to present to an audience. It is believed that this skill should be taught in school. Why is this important? To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

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These days, there are many people unencourage to speak in front of the public and some others suggest that school needs to teach presenting skills to their students. Personally, I strongly agree with
this
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 suggestion as it can benefit children in numerous ways in the near future.
This
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 essay will discuss the affections of
this
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 statement. First of all, it is undeniable that various students nowadays seem to be shy and unconfident about presenting their work or speaking in public
due to
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 insufficient competence in
this
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 kind of activity.
This
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 skill is easy to teach through assignments or group activities in which children have more opportunities to state publicly.
For example
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, a presentation of a historical story in history class trains pupils in speaking and content-organizing skills.
Therefore
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, academies should more focus on these skills to prepare pupils before entering into advanced academic levels and real-life situations,
such
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 as working and arguing. Another factor worth considering is that a manner can be improved by presenting ability because effective public speaking correlates with proper postures in each individual.
This
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 capability encourages individuals to consider their manners seriously in society, which affects them to become a person who
have
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has
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 more self-esteem and
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 attractive.
Consequently
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, these personalities tend to benefit students' characteristics and even both physical and mental health which lead to advantages for them in living and working aspects.
For instance
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, confidential people can complete different tasks that tend to generate valuable experiences and prosper their talents in various areas. In conclusion, having presentation competency has advantages for children in terms of personalities and academic performance, contributing to receiving more opportunities in both educational and career aspects.
Therefore
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, it is an excellent challenge for young people to develop
this
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 talent at a young age to prepare themselves properly.

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introduction conclusion present
The introduction sets up the topic well, but the first sentence could be rephrased for clarity. Instead of 'many people unencourage,' it could be 'many people feel unencouraged to speak.' This minor adjustment will make the sentence clearer to read.
relevant specific examples
The essay could further benefit from additional specific examples to support the points made. For instance, mentioning specific assignments or types of group activities that can enhance public speaking skills would help to make the argument more tangible.
clear comprehensive ideas
There is some awkward phrasing and minor grammatical errors throughout the essay, such as 'pupils in speaking and content-organizing skills.' It should be 'pupils in developing their speaking and content-organizing skills.' Reviewing these points for more natural English expression could improve the essay.
complete response
The essay provides a clear discussion of why teaching public speaking skills in schools is important, offering multiple perspectives on its benefits.
logical structure
You have structured your essay very well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. This makes it easy to follow your argument, which is crucial for effective writing.
introduction conclusion present
The essay concludes strongly, summarizing the main points and reiterating the importance of developing public speaking skills from a young age.
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