recently it is very common to build school and work space designs as one roof ,instead of separate rooms.Why it is so?Do you think it is positive or negative development?
Recently,the architectural models of towers have been changing vastly.The educational and economical
buildings
have open space structures instead
of distinct rooms.The reason to build such
designs is , they
promote collaboration and communication,Correct word choice
that they
moreover
, these are cost-effective.In my opinion, it has more drawbacks than advantages.The following paragraphs will discuss this
point of view.
Firstly
,the ecosystem of the earth is changing rapidly,because people need more space to live so they utilize the agricultural land to build housing schemes,and it has detrimental
effect on the earth.To overcome Add an article
a detrimental
this
situation the architects develops
new trends to build schools and large companies in Change the verb form
develop
such
a way that uses less pace and accomodate
more people.Correct your spelling
accommodates
Moreover
, these buildings
can be used for multi
purposes.Correct word choice
multiple
For example
,China is one the largest nations in regard to the population they require many places for residential areas,so they decided to introduce vertical buildings
.However
,developed countries take this
theme and start constricting properties in a way that provides more area and students develop better communication and at times of convocation or sports day
it should be used for functions.
Add a comma
day,
On the other hand
,when talking about the educational department every class level is different, they need special time for multiple tasks.At one roof-top it creates more difficulty for teachers to fulfil these activities.Furthermore
,offices have basic and advanced levels of staff who have separate responsibilities if they sit and comminute in one room it would be difficult to achieve their goals .For instance
,admins have meetings with their clients and these meetings are mostly confidential, so this
modern design fails when comes to this
perspective.In some cases, noise created by a huge number of individuals distracts from work.So it is believed that traditional buildings
are suitable for those places where more people interact with each other .
In conclusion,even though modern building layouts are echo-friendly and develop better communication and collaboration between students and staff ,it have a more negative effect on the workers and learners as it reduce the level of concentration.These schemes can be promoted for other fields of life but not in economic or educational buildings
.Submitted by atiya.noureen21 on
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Language
Try to move beyond repeating basic vocabulary and incorporate more synonyms, idiomatic expressions, and advanced vocabulary. This will show a stronger command of the English language and add depth to your arguments.
Task Response
While your essay provides a complete response to the prompt, the examples and explanations could be more detailed and varied. Providing diverse and vivid examples can illustrate your points more effectively and make your argument more convincing.
Structure
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument well and makes it easy for the reader to follow.
Task Response
You have clearly addressed the task by discussing both the reasons for open space designs and the positive and negative aspects.