It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, several remote areas on the earth, like the South Pole, are more accessible for visitors and researchers on account of many technological advancements.

While

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some people might argue that

this

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development is disadvantageous in a few aspects, I still hold the view that

this

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can bring about diverse advantages which far outweigh the shortcomings. On the one hand, there are a few disadvantages arising from humans

traveling

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travelling

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to remote natural environments. The primary reason for

this

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is that travelling to

such

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isolated places may put people at risk

due to

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extreme weather conditions. The South Pole ,

for example

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, is where the temperature is subzero, which prevents scientists and tourists from moving there.

Furthermore

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, they may

also

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face attacks from wildlife,

such

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as polar bears in the North Pole or a wide range of poisonous species in the Amazon forest.

However

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, these risks can be mitigated with thorough preparation like training in harsh conditions or equipping themselves with inherent knowledge about avoiding and dealing with wildlife animals .

On the other hand

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, I believe that the advantages of improving people’s access to diverse natural places are more significant than the drawbacks.

Firstly

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, reaching isolated

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

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is highly likely to help individuals gain more valuable experiences, giving them many stories to share with friends or family.

Moreover

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this

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opens more opportunities for enriching scientific knowledge. To be specific, researchers are now able to conduct more experiments about survival in remote areas, which diversifies the recognized information relating to the ecosystem.

Consequently

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, people may investigate and find out new solutions to the matter of survival for humankind when there will be

disater

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disaster

or lack of food in the future . In conclusion, all the aforementioned points provide a compelling argument in favour of travelling to some more isolated places in the world.

Although

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there are some potential drawbacks which could be dealt with if there is sufficient preparation for situations.

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task achievement

Your response should be more balanced in discussing the disadvantages, providing more specifics or examples rather than moving quickly to mitigation.

task achievement

Try including more concrete examples or references, particularly when discussing the advantages for researchers.

task achievement

Work on ensuring all ideas are precisely explained, avoiding overly general statements, to further enhance clarity.

coherence cohesion

Continue to use linking phrases and transitional words, but ensure they are varied throughout the essay to avoid repetition.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph centers around one main topic and surrounds with relevant supporting details to enhance logical structure.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured, with a clear introduction and conclusion.

task achievement

You've successfully presented both sides of the argument before giving a clear opinion.

coherence cohesion

Good use of phrases to link and progress your ideas logically, such as 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand'.

coherence cohesion

Strong conclusion summarizing key points and reasserting your viewpoint.

13
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

319 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

remote natural environment
scientific research
climate change
environmental preservation
economic benefits
conservation efforts
habitat disruption
pollution
cultural disruption
indigenous populations
commercialization
safety risks
personal enrichment
ecosystems
awareness
appreciation for nature

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It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as the South Pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Details of politicians’ private lives should not be published in newspapers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today more people are overweight than ever before. What are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this epidemic?

Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the ‏past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages of television ‏for children. ‏

Some people believe that the good leaders are born, whereas others hold the opinion that the leadership qualities could be obtained during the life. Who represents the good leader qualities indeed?

Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with trade, health and education. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your experience.