IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

There is a table showing the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished and the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how were pleased during the same two periods.

There is a table showing the numbers of visitors to Ashdown Museum during the year before and the year after it was refurbished and the charts show the result of surveys asking visitors how were pleased during the same two periods.
#numbers #visitors #ashdown #museum #year #show #surveys #two #periods
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a table showing the numbers of
visitors
Use synonyms
 to Ashdown Museum during the
year
Use synonyms
 before and the
year
Use synonyms
 after it was refurbished and the charts show the result of surveys asking
visitors
Use synonyms
 how were pleased during the same two periods. A
year
Use synonyms
 before refurbishment from
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
 number of 74000
due to
Linking Words
 the chart the high figure of
visitors
Use synonyms
 ended up dissatisfied
while
Linking Words
 after a renovation
this
Linking Words
 result changed to satisfied. The lowest percentage of both charts which are obvious the
year
Use synonyms
 before and after restoration demonstrated that no response to surveys of visitor satisfaction. In detail, 31,013
visitors
Use synonyms
 were unsatisfied before refurbishment but these figures decreased to 13,800 after the repair. The number of satisfied people increased from 22,200 before the revamp to 36,800 after it. 15 per cent of the total of 74,000 were very satisfied in the pre-renovation survey, and 35 per cent in the post-survey of 92,000 people. The figure of very dissatisfied
visitors
Use synonyms
 declined from 10 percent
according to
Linking Words
 the first chart to 5 percent after the renovation.
To conclude
Linking Words
, the refurbishment of Ashdown
museum
Capitalize word
Museum
show examples
 had the greatest impact on the number of dissatisfied and satisfied people.
Submitted by checkmyessay9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "numbers of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: